• Welcome! It’s great to see you. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

ocd about new phone

U

undone

New member
Joined
Jul 3, 2020
Messages
2
Location
USA
[i initially posted this somewhere else and copy+pasted it here, so sorry if it seems incomplete, but i'm too lazy to retype everything]

i have a new phone, and i like the model and the color, but i can't use it due to having constant intrusive thoughts whenever i try, preventing me from being able to concentrate on the task at hand. this is all due to me using wintergreen instead of regular rubbing alcohol to wipe sticker residue off the back of the case.

but i'm also afraid to return the phone, and go to a different apple store and get a new phone (and corresponding case) of the exact same model, because of how it will look on my credit card history, and i'm afraid that anxiety will lead me to manifest intrusive thoughts about the NEW new phone, and i'm just so mad at myself for fucking myself over like this, and i feel like my life was on the right trajectory and i was starting to get better until my mom broke my old phone, and the new obsession started.

i'm honestly starting to feel suicidal because using my phone to walk and listen to music was one of my favorite coping mechanisms that i did every single day, and now i can't do that because i literally can't use or touch the phone without being innundated by intrusive thoughts.

why is my life so complicated? i fucking hate living like this. every day i wake up and this topic is on my mind but i really don't want a different phone color. black is the best. i don't want to get the same model in the same color for fear of it being 'suspicious'. but i can't use this phone either. and i can't get a different model unless it's an even older iphone because i don't want to spend more money on features that i don't really need. please help me. i'm honestly so tired of living with ocd and the self-disgust and hatred that it drives in me. i need to make a decision on the phone today, because i've been obsessing over this for the past 6 days, and it's been preventing me from going out and doing literally anything else.
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

Well-known member
Moderator
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
13,483
Location
England
Hi,
Welcome to the forum
I'm so sorry you have OCD, have you had this problem with any other items? And overcome it?
Therapy might be useful something like CBT which could help you think differently.
Hugs
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 13, 2016
Messages
1,271
Sorry to sound ignorant etc. but is the back of the phone now spoilt :hug:
 
Top