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Not PTSD exactly....

M

mememe

Member
Joined
Aug 5, 2008
Messages
10
Sorry if this is not the right place to put this...I'll keep a long story short. Basically I was pleged with drink and forced into sex by my bf when I was a young teenager and for ten years since iv found it difficult to get over. I used to get flashbacks but then it turned more into an obsessive guilt thing that i couldn't stop thinking about. I'm a lot older now but still feel like i havnt gotten over it and i still think about it alot. Iv talked about it a lot to my counseller and a little to my current bf but it's still an issue. How do I get over it and stop thinking about it? xxx
 
J

johnny ashton

Member
Joined
Sep 13, 2008
Messages
10
Location
widnes
Sorry if this is not the right place to put this...I'll keep a long story short. Basically I was pleged with drink and forced into sex by my bf when I was a young teenager and for ten years since iv found it difficult to get over. I used to get flashbacks but then it turned more into an obsessive guilt thing that i couldn't stop thinking about. I'm a lot older now but still feel like i havnt gotten over it and i still think about it alot. Iv talked about it a lot to my counseller and a little to my current bf but it's still an issue. How do I get over it and stop thinking about it? xxx
Hello
im johnny
I keep having flash backs over my past traumas in life ,i was abused as a child and my ex wife mentally tortured me when i told her and her parents i was abused as a child ,i had 6 years of hell and was called a childmolester and attacked ,this knocked me sick as i could not read to my children or like close contact off them ,id have a panic attack really .
My wife in the end would bring young girls round asking me for money for sex i ended up on anti depressants sleeping tablets ,and vodka .
My ex wife even have a neighnour go in our daughters bedroom and lock his self in ,i found him and half killed him ,i didnt know if i was comin or going i was lost .
She was a teacher aswell ?
I have never bathed my children or let them see me naked if i seen them naked it knocked me sick ,i was raped. by my sister when i was 11 she was a lot older and my mother would beat me and drown me in the bath as a child as my father and her divorced and she hated the male off spring ,i never felt loved ?
Im divorced now and my 3 children left me a winners medal ,i have never hit my children or shouted at them ?
Im attending a support group and have joined a toastmasters aswell my speach has improved lots .
Id advise you to try and seek a good councillor or support group .
Take care and start to love who you are thats the first step you need to do ,
All the best johnny
 
F

faeriedreams

Member
Joined
Apr 7, 2009
Messages
6
My new Journey with PTSD and BPD

I was looking for a place to post and this seemed as if it was the right place.
First off I would say you need to find a support group of women like you. This helped me tremdously. You realize there are others out there like you, but you don't know it until you meet them. Everything you are feeling, they have felt at one time or another in their life. Your counselor should be able to tell you of a group like this, or suggest they start one.

One thing to remember is that you need to learn your triggers, because I just found out this week it is a life's process to deal with your condition. I just found out this week, after much fighting with myself that I am suffering from PTSD and BPD. I had been diagnosed with these in the past and thought I had did everything to keep it under control. How wrong I was. I was told that something is triggering the PTSD, which then causes my BPD to kick in and all hell breaks loose in my head and life.

Like both of you I suffered from sexual abuse as a child. There was physical abuse, emotional abuse, then on my part came the alcohol, drugs, sex and whatever else there was to cover up everything. Now I've been told that some of this crap is resurfacing. I didn't really want to take this journey again, but I guess there is more I need to know to get to the person I was meant to become.

Just keep the faith in your heart, and know that you are not alone.

:grouphug:
 
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