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Not my first time on this forum feeling crap

P

Purple butterfly

Guest
Hey one and all not my first time to have joined this forum... I left as people were always on my back. I was recently (2013) diagnosed with bpd emotionally unstable. I have been in a relationship that broke down recently as he kept feeling the need to lie to me... I feel like a moron for ending it now though as now I am stuck back in the walls of my bedroom with no friends. I am just feeling completely alone and more vulnerable than ever.... I have a job just they are telling me they are looking to suspend me. So I am scared of losing my job only for of socialisation don't get me wrong if I could not socialise I wouldn't but I'd drive myself mad. I have seriously bad impulses including sh and tonight I am going to see a private counsellor (7pm) u don't take my meds as I don't see the point they don't help and I am just feeling generally quote rubbish about myself I just don't know what to do if anyone's out there I hope your feeling better than I do now x x take care x
 
ScaredCat

ScaredCat

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Sorry you are feeling so rubbish and that everything is stacked against you. Hope the counsellor appt goes well
 
R

Rottinginpain

Member
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Jan 19, 2015
Messages
12
Hi, I'm sorry ur struggling. Let us know how ur counseling appointment went.
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

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Welcome back to the forum. :hug:
I hope that your counselling session went ok?
 
G

greatfulmomoftwo

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I'm so sorry your hurting... hugs to you my friend. Let us know how the appointment went...
 
L

lovagemuffin

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Oct 21, 2014
Messages
640
hi I just want to say it is better to be single than in the WRONG relationship for yourself that was a brave moveand altho you may feel lonely you did the right thing
can you have a word with your boss about how this is causing you stress?
 
RainbowHeartz

RainbowHeartz

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hello sorry your struggling :hug:
 
P

Purple butterfly

Guest
Hey all the counselling session went well I suppose I didn't speak much and kept changing the subject she picked up that I was scratching myself anxiously as for the relationship I wouldn't get back with him some of the things he said to me when drunk are not worth it anyway and work they don't care I'm just feeling really low at the minute tbh and not sure how to pick myself up
 
G

greatfulmomoftwo

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Jan 17, 2015
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Did you restart your meds? They may need to be readjusted for you. So glad the counseling session went well.
 
messymoo

messymoo

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I'm sorry the meds don't help you, it's good your having counselling though. I think it's important to have a space that's safe to talk about how you feel and what's going on for you.
I'm sorry your struggling at the moment hang on in there and welcome back.
 
P

Purple butterfly

Guest
I thought about that the safe place thing but I am not the best at opening up..... She said I did really well last night as I did talk a little but I'm kinda a little dubious of it all. I suppose I'll be OK back at my psychiatrist next week.... Hopefully he can do summet abut my meds :'( just feeling so deflated at the minute...... Don't know what's up with me.... Having serious urges to sh I don't do it much anymore dint even know why I am having urges it's driving me a bit mad.
 
G

greatfulmomoftwo

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I'm scared for you...I see post that say sh...what does that mean? Sorry for the ignorance
 
Wiseowl

Wiseowl

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Mar 13, 2011
Messages
8,419
Hi greatfulmomoftwo

SH is a shortened version of self-harm. :)
 
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