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not being a mum

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ManDss

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Joined
Jul 24, 2020
Messages
259
Location
Argentina
Sorry to hear, big hug from distance.

I also feel bad because dont have a child, or know I would be able to have one in the near future.

I always dreamed to have a child, since I was really little (10 old or so). Always thought to have 1 steady partner, family, and all that. And dont have that and how things have twisted for me, its such a bad thing.

Ive been thinking about this quite recently, its like "what the hell happened to me".

The other day I found a "friend" on the street, he had a child, just 6 month old, and I had to fake I was happy because he is not a person with a steady job, or a good education (I think still doesnt finish highschool, he 29 old). I always thought if have a child be able to aford all, and be sure to to raise it.
 
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Elisante

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Joined
May 16, 2020
Messages
1,173
Location
Greece
and I had to fake I was happy because he is not a person with a steady job, or a good education
That's kind of mean. If he is a good father nothing else matters, especially whether or not he finished school.
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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Feb 27, 2020
Messages
4,504
Location
Nashua NH
Yes I can relate to this I also wish I had a child. I guess it wasn't meant to be though. I would of wanted a girl and I would have named her Mary. I do understand what you are saying. I don't think I would have made a good mother but I don't really know that.❤
If I had a girl I would have wanted to name her Emily.
If I had a boy I would have wanted to name him Alexander.
 
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Nukelavee

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Joined
Dec 17, 2019
Messages
2,522
Location
London, ON
I'd name my kid Arby, and if people asked what it was short for, I'd say "His full name is Arbitrary."

I am going to name my next doggle Arby...
 
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Am33

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Joined
Sep 28, 2020
Messages
153
Location
Fiji
In some places they have co housing like in Denmark where people all live together in a community (come ye into unity ) everyone has their place and there is a big dining hall meeting room . The young mothers have more free time cause there are older people can watch them. They can be " parents " even "grandparents" I see that as the future where like minded people with the same interests , needs can cohabitate.
 
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sallimae76

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Joined
Jun 18, 2019
Messages
630
Location
USA
In some places they have co housing like in Denmark where people all live together in a community (come ye into unity ) everyone has their place and there is a big dining hall meeting room . The young mothers have more free time cause there are older people can watch them. They can be " parents " even "grandparents" I see that as the future where like minded people with the same interests , needs can cohabitate.
I would love to live that way!
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Moderator
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Jan 4, 2013
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14,757
Location
England
I feel the same Lu, I would have loved kids. I know deep down it is for the best.
I'm not well enough to look after a child physically or mentally.
 
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ManDss

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 24, 2020
Messages
259
Location
Argentina
That's kind of mean. If he is a good father nothing else matters, especially whether or not he finished school.
Yes, its kind of mean, heh. Should explain couple of things why I dont see this friend so great about having a child.

But I mean, I dnt like those people who dont have a kid without a steady life.

First prepare, make a solid ground, and then have a kid. Its my view.
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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Joined
Feb 27, 2020
Messages
4,504
Location
Nashua NH
In some places they have co housing like in Denmark where people all live together in a community (come ye into unity ) everyone has their place and there is a big dining hall meeting room . The young mothers have more free time cause there are older people can watch them. They can be " parents " even "grandparents" I see that as the future where like minded people with the same interests , needs can cohabitate.
We have the same “intentional communities” in some places here.
 
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Elisante

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Joined
May 16, 2020
Messages
1,173
Location
Greece
Yes, its kind of mean, heh. Should explain couple of things why I dont see this friend so great about having a child.

But I mean, I dnt like those people who dont have a kid without a steady life.

First prepare, make a solid ground, and then have a kid. Its my view.
Completely disagree. I think the opposite. I think people that proclaim that they do not want children are obnoxious and unnatural.
 
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ManDss

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 24, 2020
Messages
259
Location
Argentina
Completely disagree. I think the opposite. I think people that proclaim that they do not want children are obnoxious and unnatural.
Why u think people that dnt want to have a kid are obnoxious and unnatural. I think theres nothing wrong with those people, its just their desition
 
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Nukelavee

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Joined
Dec 17, 2019
Messages
2,522
Location
London, ON
Completely disagree. I think the opposite. I think people that proclaim that they do not want children are obnoxious and unnatural.
Seems harsh and judgmental.

Even if I could father children, the reason I don't care is "Why have a child?" Seriously, why should I want to? Any moron can produce a child just through being stupid or unsafe, how is that a significant achievement? I mean, sure, producing and raising a person that is healthy, considerate, and productive is an achievement, but too many parents are honestly crap parents, and raise crap people.
 
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