No Shame On Going On Public Assistance for Life

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sallimae76

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I am not a superwoman. If these voices won't go away, I will go on Public Assistance for life and live in public housing for the mentally ill. I can't work with these voices, and I am not ashamed to say that I hear them.
 
NWiddi

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You may be one of the lucky ones and medication will make them go away, but if they don't go away don't consider it a failure, mine never did and that goes for many of the other forum members, they will help you cope with them better when your voices are nothing but a whisper instead of being loud all the time.

For me it was like turning a stereo down from 10 to 1 and a huge wave a relief came over me when that happened. I'm still trying to negotiate for some silence from mine for a few hours each day and three years on I'm still getting nowhere but that doesn't mean it won't happen in the future, I always hope.

Medication hurts voices more than you'll realise and it turned mine from a bully to a beggar, always begging me to stop ignoring him and to come off medication but neither will happen until I get what I want from him.
 
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sallimae76

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You may be one of the lucky ones and medication will make them go away, but if they don't go away don't consider it a failure, mine never did and that goes for many of the other forum members, they will help you cope with them better when your voices are nothing but a whisper instead of being loud all the time.

For me it was like turning a stereo down from 10 to 1 and a huge wave a relief came over me when that happened. I'm still trying to negotiate for some silence from mine for a few hours each day and three years on I'm still getting nowhere but that doesn't mean it won't happen in the future, I always hope.

Medication hurts voices more than you'll realise and it turned mine from a bully to a beggar, always begging me to stop ignoring him and to come off medication but neither will happen until I get what I want from him.
Do you work?
 
NWiddi

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I'm on Employment Support Allowance (ESA) in the UK.

I don't work at the moment, and get £256.90 every 2 weeks, around £30 of that is because I go to support groups but I've only been on benefits for the past 3 years since I started hearing a voice.
 
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sallimae76

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Okay. Well my voice wants me to pretend and not admit to others what is happening. It is quiet when others are around. But I have promised myself if I can't work, that I won't feel bad about it.
 
NWiddi

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Mine tried getting me to do that and it didn't work out for me, when I told the truth and got medication everything got a lot better.

Don't worry or be ashamed about not working, your voices are quite severe at the moment but that can always change.

Being quiet while around others is a good sign that your voices don't want others to know what they're doing to you, mine still talks around other people and doesn't care who hears him.

I believe everyone has at least one voice inside them and voices can talk to and hear each other.
 
sadpunchingbag

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If you have done everything you possibly can to get better via help and organizations only you will truely know the answer then if thats how you want to live life go ahead
 
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sallimae76

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So during an interview I just had the voice broke through to say I'm an ape and I'm mad. It was very quiet though.
 
NWiddi

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Apart from that how did the interview go?
 
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sallimae76

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Apart from that how did the interview go?
It went okay. I don't think I dazzled them. You know I left my dream job 6 years ago because before these voices started, I use to get strange emails and people on the street came up to me and told me I was a virgin, and other strange stuff. After I quit, the voices promptly started. They have been on and off, and came on again in March.

I wish I didn't leave that job.

I called my Catholic church today. I am going to speak to a priest about the voices. Hopefully they will reveal themselves in front of him.

What do you think of my sister telling me I was going to burn, and now the voice says "burn" to me?
 
NWiddi

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Depends what the context was in your sister telling you to burn (not that any context is right, that's an awful thing to say) and your voice will just be copying her because it knows how much it offended you.
 
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Feathers1984

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I am not a superwoman. If these voices won't go away, I will go on Public Assistance for life and live in public housing for the mentally ill. I can't work with these voices, and I am not ashamed to say that I hear them.
That is the bravest thing to post. 3 days ago I told myself the same thing! I have admitted to myself how debilitating this is and that I may have to get some kind of aid. I am lucky enough to be in a position right now in my relationship where I don’t have to work. But that luck will run out and I don’t have faith that I will get through a 9-5 hearing what i hear all day. I came here to post a thread about it and found this. And I think you’re brave to not be ashamed about hearing voices. No one in my life knows about my voices. I am medicated and they are much quieter. So I hope I can be as brave as you one day and come out about this.
Peace and good luck to you
 
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sallimae76

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That is the bravest thing to post. 3 days ago I told myself the same thing! I have admitted to myself how debilitating this is and that I may have to get some kind of aid. I am lucky enough to be in a position right now in my relationship where I don’t have to work. But that luck will run out and I don’t have faith that I will get through a 9-5 hearing what i hear all day. I came here to post a thread about it and found this. And I think you’re brave to not be ashamed about hearing voices. No one in my life knows about my voices. I am medicated and they are much quieter. So I hope I can be as brave as you one day and come out about this.
Peace and good luck to you

Thank you. I posted that in frustration. My voices are also very faint, but for some reason last night, they were kind of loud and kept telling me to "burn" kept me up all night. I kind of posted it as a threat to the voices to go away. 2 friends know about the voices, but family doesn't. I would like to work, but if they come back strong, I will not hesitate to shut the door on a work life, and just live on public assistance like I said. I am not "Job" from the bible, and I am not going to endure abuse and pretend it is not happening. I am only human.

I sympathize with you. I am glad the medications keeps the volume down. Don't try to be a superwoman. If the voices are beating you down, it is okay to say I surrender, and I am not going to pretend anymore.
 
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That’s so interesting because when this experience first began for some reason “Job” came to mind so that’s funny you mention that. I find it unfair that I have made myself suffer in silence but coming out about this to my spouse and others is not something I’m prepared to do yet. Mine wAke me up at night when I’m trying to sleep telling me I’m going to hell and saying “Lucifer” or “Satan” very loudly. I have several posts with all the other phrases I hear on the daily. They are relentless. But like you said, I’m only human and sometimes it’s not easy to ignore. After all they can hear our thoughts in response to their outbursts so ignoring it by turning off your thoughts??? That makes no sense. I dread the day I am forced to make a decision on work. I just recently moved states with my spouse and young daughter and have only just begun finding a new psychiatrist to adjust my meds. For now I see a regular doc that only prescribed me the med and dose that I came here with but I need more. Since I’ve moved here they have got much louder. I have good days but when a “good day” is just a matter of how loud or quiet your voices in your head are.. then how good of a day is it really??? Lol and no one in the world has a clue that we are suffering. It blows my mind. I often fantasize about the ability to be able to “think my own thoughts” one day like I did before this began.
 
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sallimae76

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That’s so interesting because when this experience first began for some reason “Job” came to mind so that’s funny you mention that. I find it unfair that I have made myself suffer in silence but coming out about this to my spouse and others is not something I’m prepared to do yet. Mine wAke me up at night when I’m trying to sleep telling me I’m going to hell and saying “Lucifer” or “Satan” very loudly. I have several posts with all the other phrases I hear on the daily. They are relentless. But like you said, I’m only human and sometimes it’s not easy to ignore. After all they can hear our thoughts in response to their outbursts so ignoring it by turning off your thoughts??? That makes no sense. I dread the day I am forced to make a decision on work. I just recently moved states with my spouse and young daughter and have only just begun finding a new psychiatrist to adjust my meds. For now I see a regular doc that only prescribed me the med and dose that I came here with but I need more. Since I’ve moved here they have got much louder. I have good days but when a “good day” is just a matter of how loud or quiet your voices in your head are.. then how good of a day is it really??? Lol and no one in the world has a clue that we are suffering. It blows my mind. I often fantasize about the ability to be able to “think my own thoughts” one day like I did before this began.
Oh my God, you are so strong! My heart sincerely breaks for you. My voices are also "devilish". He says "I'm mad" "I'm an ape" "I can't believe it" and tells me to "burn". Started saying "we're dead". I thought the devil targeted me because I am a 43 year old virgin. But you are a married woman, with children. I don't know how you hide it. I will keep you in my thoughts. I'm so sorry.
 
sadpunchingbag

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I'm on Employment Support Allowance (ESA) in the UK.

I don't work at the moment, and get £256.90 every 2 weeks, around £30 of that is because I go to support groups but I've only been on benefits for the past 3 years since I started hearing a voice.
Why you not on pip aswell ?
 
sadpunchingbag

sadpunchingbag

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Probably because I don't need housing support or something like that.
I dont think its for that dude look into it you are entitled to it 99% sure check the section on here i beleive its benifits and housing dude much love
 

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