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no relationship and can’t get a girlfriend due to being socially awkward

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ManDss

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Jul 24, 2020
Messages
276
Location
Argentina
they say apps like “tinder” is good for people with it but im still too shy and scared. and people on dating sites usually have problems with themselves so i would like very much to avoid that. and none of them i am really attracted to.
Make a try on tinder. You could say and specify that you are not a big social person, to try to find a date that also isnt much social, so the date is not so akward, and both are in the same page.
 
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markn1996

Member
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Oct 2, 2020
Messages
21
Location
Toledo, Ohio
Make a try on tinder. You could say and specify that you are not a big social person, to try to find a date that also isnt much social, so the date is not so akward, and both are in the same page.
not to offend anyone what i say, but if i did that i would just attract the ugliest ones and i just can’t do that. i mean not to be picky but i would just like one decent looking girl, all i ask for.

and i don’t think tinder is really for serious relationships.
 
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ManDss

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Jul 24, 2020
Messages
276
Location
Argentina
not to offend anyone what i say, but if i did that i would just attract the ugliest ones and i just can’t do that. i mean not to be picky but i would just like one decent looking girl, all i ask for.

and i don’t think tinder is really for serious relationships.
But its better to try and see what happens. U can specify u want serious relationship.

If u get responses from girls u dnt like, u just dont reply them.
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

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Jun 13, 2016
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1,489
Make a try on tinder. You could say and specify that you are not a big social person, to try to find a date that also isnt much social, so the date is not so akward, and both are in the same page.
I think I understand the point you are trying to make here :) It's perfectly fine and maybe even a good thing to mention insecurities. For example there is nothing wrong with saying you have Social Anxiety. It may attract someone who can make the world of difference to your quality of life and Personal Growth, it may also attract someone who wants to fix you, but doesn't have the tools for the job. It's a mixed bag, but it's still attraction, and it should dissuade those who might have a negative impact on your well-being and life. Speaking of attraction, looks don't equate to a stereo-typed personality or characteristics. What someone sees on the outside (looks), may well be different to what is on the inside, this is why we get to know people... Hope this helps :)
 
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ManDss

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Messages
276
Location
Argentina
I think I understand the point you are trying to make here :) It's perfectly fine and maybe even a good thing to mention insecurities. For example there is nothing wrong with saying you have Social Anxiety. It may attract someone who can make the world of difference to your quality of life and Personal Growth, it may also attract someone who wants to fix you, but doesn't have the tools for the job. It's a mixed bag, but it's still attraction, and it should dissuade those who might have a negative impact on your well-being and life. Speaking of attraction, looks don't equate to a stereo-typed personality or characteristics. What someone sees on the outside (looks), may well be different to what is on the inside, this is why we get to know people... Hope this helps :)
Exactly, I think some people try too much to aparent they are confident like others are. If u say how u are u have now chances to find others who are like u.
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

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Exactly, I think some people try too much to aparent they are confident like others are. If u say how u are u have now chances to find others who are like u.
Who are like you, or even like you for who you are :)
 
Faith198

Faith198

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Mar 30, 2020
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U.S.
Idk if anyone has recommended this but I guess Okcupid is decent. I really wouldn’t mess with online tho. In my opinion I think you should just wait it out until this is all over with. Or maybe just date around casually? I use to be very scared to even talk online but I’ve come out of my shell more and it’s easier than in person. Everyone is different though and I understand if you feel uncomfortable about doing that. I wish you the best of luck finding a partner. I struggle with bad anxiety so I know how difficult things like this can be
 
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markn1996

Member
Joined
Oct 2, 2020
Messages
21
Location
Toledo, Ohio
i would also like to clarify that i am not no introvert person i actually like being social, im just too scared too
But its better to try and see what happens. U can specify u want serious relationship.

If u get responses from girls u dnt like, u just dont reply them.
i have been on the app a bunch of times. all even decent looking girls are like 25 miles from me (and i have no car or license) it just ain’t for me online. making friends (which led me to be unsuccessful) or relationships. real hot girls dont use dating apps. only the type of girls that’s been cheated on a bunch of times.

yeah, i would have a better chance at winning the lottery actually.
 
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markn1996

Member
Joined
Oct 2, 2020
Messages
21
Location
Toledo, Ohio
Idk if anyone has recommended this but I guess Okcupid is decent. I really wouldn’t mess with online tho. In my opinion I think you should just wait it out until this is all over with. Or maybe just date around casually? I use to be very scared to even talk online but I’ve come out of my shell more and it’s easier than in person. Everyone is different though and I understand if you feel uncomfortable about doing that. I wish you the best of luck finding a partner. I struggle with bad anxiety so I know how difficult things like this can be
exactly. its just for people with problems. ok, you can say i have a problem, but its not like i am a introvert and don’t like people (hope i didn’t come across as that in this thread) i do enjoy the company of people and like being social. it just makes me really nervous being in social situations, because i am not used to it.
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

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Jun 13, 2016
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If it helps in my experience Confidence overides fear, but unfortunately to gain confidence it involves practice and experience in Social Interaction, which can be gained through joining Social Groups/Clubs etc. Hope this helps :)
 
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markn1996

Member
Joined
Oct 2, 2020
Messages
21
Location
Toledo, Ohio
If it helps in my experience Confidence overides fear, but unfortunately to gain confidence it involves practice and experience in Social Interaction, which can be gained through joining Social Groups/Clubs etc. Hope this helps :)
i don’t know of any clubs in my area. i live in mostly a boring small town in toledo.
 
jajingna

jajingna

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Jul 31, 2020
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Location
Canada
Huh, I thought Toledo was a city with approx a quarter million, that's what a google search says
 
jajingna

jajingna

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Jul 31, 2020
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Location
Canada
Well sure but that doesn't make Toledo small. There's like 12,000 people in my town. I've lived in or visited numerous cities though with millions. It's really a totally different world in a large city vs a small town.
 
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