• Welcome! It’s great to see you.

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

No one has ever loved me in a way that made me feel loved

S

spooperdooper

Member
Joined
Nov 5, 2020
Messages
10
Location
UK
My mother's love is overbearing, shows how insecure and afraid she is of losing me, makes me feel scared of leaving her for her own sake.

My father's love is scary. When I was small, if someone scared me then he would be violent towards them, he would fight people to protect me. When I showed that I was afraid, my mother insisted that he did these things because he loves me.

I have 2 friends, one I feel barely connected to and feel no love from. My other friend is my best friend, though the love I reveive from her feels more like pity. Like she is aware of how much I rely on her, and she just feels sorry for me.
 
S

siliconom

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
348
Location
Quebec
I think you are 'projecting' your own feelings onto those closest to you. Depression will make you feel this way.

Have you tried therapy?
 
MeAndMyDepression

MeAndMyDepression

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 6, 2021
Messages
1,225
Location
Punta Gorda, Florida, USA
It seems that both of your parents are protective of you. That seems like love to me. Am I wrong?
 
S

spooperdooper

Member
Joined
Nov 5, 2020
Messages
10
Location
UK
I'm in therapy now, I actually had this realisation in our last session on Friday, but I feel too ashamed to resolve anything. It just feels so pitiful and lonely admitting my feelings. I know I won't resolve these issues if I don't try apeaking about it more in therapy, I'll try in our next session. These thoughts are just really getting to me tonight.
 
S

spooperdooper

Member
Joined
Nov 5, 2020
Messages
10
Location
UK
It seems that both of your parents are protective of you. That seems like love to me. Am I wrong?
I agree, it is love, and I've always accepted it as love. It just doesn't make me feel loved, if that makes sense. I'm sure it's my issue and not there's, I just struggle to feel loved or wanted even when those around me are showing it in their own way.
 
S

siliconom

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
348
Location
Quebec
I think your condition is making you feel unloved. I think a lot of folk would kill to have parents like yours. I think a lot of folk would kill to have two parents living together these days!

You need to change your thought patterns which is the whole point of therapy. So be brave and speak up. Don't worry if you start crying. We all do
 
S

spooperdooper

Member
Joined
Nov 5, 2020
Messages
10
Location
UK
I think your condition is making you feel unloved. I think a lot of folk would kill to have parents like yours. I think a lot of folk would kill to have two parents living together these days!

You need to change your thought patterns which is the whole point of therapy. So be brave and speak up. Don't worry if you start crying. We all do
Thank you. I need to remind myself that my thoughts aren't always my own when I'm depressed, and it can force me to believe things that aren't true. I'm having a particular hard night with these thoughts, but I'll keep trying.
 
S

siliconom

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
348
Location
Quebec
Have you ever tried doing meditation? It really really helps with those kinds of thoughts, by allowing you to separate yourself from them and instead if getting entangled with them, you can just watch them and say to yourself "what a crock of shit!"

Give it a try if you can but you need to do every day and it takes about two months to feel the positive effects. But I guarantee it will work. When depressed is the time you feel least able to do it but is in fact the best time to do it.
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 13, 2016
Messages
2,225
I agree, it is love, and I've always accepted it as love. It just doesn't make me feel loved, if that makes sense. I'm sure it's my issue and not there's, I just struggle to feel loved or wanted even when those around me are showing it in their own way.
I wonder if you have a expectation, a vision of what love is. Perhaps you could share that expectation etc. :)
 
Similar threads
Thread starter Title Forum Replies Date
R Has anyone ever been on Trintellix? What were your experiences? Depression Forum 2
K My cat has been put to sleep Depression Forum 30
L My depression has prevented fatherhood Depression Forum 4
ChibiHufflepuff My escape has become a personal hellscape... Depression Forum 1
HellRider The Delusion has to be broken Depression Forum 4
L Today Has Been Bad. TRIGGAR WARNING Depression Forum 8
anodyne Lifelong loneliness has made me hate people Depression Forum 27
L has anyone noticed smart people are angry Depression Forum 8
F Writing a letter to someone who has passed and keeping a blog Depression Forum 5
I My girlfriend has depression and broke up with me Depression Forum 8
P Helping/supporting my girlfriend who has depression Depression Forum 3
D Think my dad has depression (advice needed) Depression Forum 6
T Reality has become way too depressing. Depression Forum 13
J Gum pain has been driving me ill Depression Forum 5
MeAndMyDepression Who has concentration/memory problems because of depression? Depression Forum 5
M Girlfriend has depression and has pushed away. Need advice/support Depression Forum 2
J SPRAVATO for Treatment Resistance Depression Has anyone used Spravato? Depression Forum 4
H Husband has depression Depression Forum 3
M My dad has now caused me to get anxiety attacks Depression Forum 5
IcyShadow The darkness has returned Depression Forum 5
S My boyfriends depression has become worse and now he’s acting mean? Depression Forum 63
Fairy Lucretia my dog has a poorly tummy Depression Forum 23
S New relationship has pushed me back down again Depression Forum 6
K How to help someone who has tried to commit suicide (two times) Depression Forum 6
M Depression has turned me into a monster Depression Forum 4
J Has my depressed fiancé fallen out of love? Depression Forum 6
wollie At last my pdoc has found a med that works for me Depression Forum 7
Tawny Depression has put it's slippers on Depression Forum 61
B My girlfriend has depression and is pushing me away. Depression Forum 3
G Mom has been in a depressive episode for over a month Depression Forum 2
Sendmetothevoid13 Do you ever feel like you're existing and not living? Depression Forum 34
L Do you ever wish you’d been aborted? Depression Forum 14
doexdeer Do you ever feel like Depression Forum 7
GaryC123 No one will ever understand my pain but me Depression Forum 19
U I'm feeling worse than ever Depression Forum 7
S anxiety and depression, does it ever end?? Depression Forum 6
R Is it ever okay to discuss my partner's mental health with their parents? When is it time to try a new prescription? Depression Forum 14
S Ever felt sad but don't know why? What's going on :\ Depression Forum 8
Hardknocks88 the most boring story ever. Depression Forum 8
U Have you ever called a suicide helpline? How did it go? Depression Forum 8
J Am I broken, will it ever get better? Depression Forum 9
M Have you ever lost your mind because loneliness ? Depression Forum 25
L Will this ever end Depression Forum 56
L No one will ever love me Depression Forum 31
Tawny I promise i will never ever kill myself Depression Forum 11
B Whats the point? Nothing ever works out Depression Forum 10
L If I Don't Believe I'll Ever Be Happy, Does That Guarantee I Won't? Depression Forum 41
N No-one ever messages me first / no "friends" Depression Forum 25
L Depressed and Feeling Inadequate to My Loved Ones Depression Forum 4
L Loss of loved one Depression Forum 3

Similar threads

Top