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No email replies makes me feel taken advantage of.

Q

qwerty1234

Guest
I have been emailing old and new friends and past lovers and have not been getting replies back. I feel taken advantage of sand taken for granted and devalued. Any tips for managing these feelings? Thank you!
 
Q

qwerty1234

Guest
fairytales

I keep expecting a fairytale life and or hoping for one, and not getting one and finding life boring instead.
 
H

Helena1

Well-known member
Forum Safety Team
Joined
Oct 11, 2014
Messages
10,575
Location
UK
When did you email them, I wouldn't really expect much of a response from past friends or lovers.
 
Q

qwerty1234

Guest
1 day to 1 week ago.
Past friends sometimes reply, it makes me sad if they don't see me as a friend anymore. I still consider them my friend.
 
FadeToBlack

FadeToBlack

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 26, 2018
Messages
127
Location
UK
Unfortunately acceptance and indifference is the only way to deal with lost connections with people.

I have not seen a friend for 8 years.

I am lucky that I have family close by, some people don't have that either.
 
Q

qwerty1234

Guest
It is so hard for a sensitive person like me to move on. People say to cut bad people out of your life, but I have to be forgiving or else I would have no friends.

Maybe except on this site :)
 
Q

qwerty1234

Guest
People reply to me almost every day and yet it is not enough.

Thoughts that go through my head -
I feel lonely and want more stimulation

I don't want to email them though because they don't always put thought into their replies and I don't get much out of it

It is hard to think, I am tired
 
FadeToBlack

FadeToBlack

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 26, 2018
Messages
127
Location
UK
It is so hard for a sensitive person like me to move on. People say to cut bad people out of your life, but I have to be forgiving or else I would have no friends.

Maybe except on this site :)
Having now been through two separate sets of friends, I have had to do it twice now. Once because I had to, once because I had no say.

It hurt the second time. I thought I'd actually met nice people, who in the main didn't do drugs. I wish I had never told them my diagnosis, but things fell apart before that anyway as I was not thinking straight and started to isolate.

I am not saying these people are bad. They might not act right sometimes, but people drift apart over time unfortunately - it doesn't always mean there has to be any bad feeling.

Forgiving people if they are not being nice to you only strings things along and damages your confidence. I am at the point now where I would rather be alone than have to go through all that again. I don't like it, but things are simpler this way.
 
L

lima86

New member
Joined
Nov 30, 2018
Messages
1
Forgiving is not only way to be happy. Sometimes we need to be more strong for living a peaceful life. How can we take care of our mind? We always think others what people say. But we need to hear own self.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Q

qwerty1234

Guest
Hi, thank you so, so much. I feel cared for and stood up for. I crave caring people and this is why I reach out so much. I am not sure I still would without the bpd.

It bothers me because my friends who do reply, reply with much less than I write them. Some of them do rec9procate evenly, others do not.
 
C

Cleopatra_

Active member
Joined
Nov 24, 2018
Messages
39
Location
Ireland
I feel your pain, loneliness is my constant companion.
 
Q

qwerty1234

Guest
Hi Cleopatra, it is so nice to meet you. I am always lonely... I live with my father but he is happy, so I have to go online to find people who feel as I do.

Hope you are doing ok today!! Thank you for your response, it means a lot to me.

Today I am doing a little work and have been emailing my friends less. I am feeling lonely still, but more secure, so am able to concetrate.

Meanwhile I wish I had a full on job, I do a volunteer job and I love it but I feel so different.
 
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