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Night Out!

prairiechick

prairiechick

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I finally did something social tonight that didn't involve my family! I've been having such a hard time making friends and getting connected since I moved back in July, so I am really proud of myself. I found a church that I think I will feel comfortable going to, and tonight they had a game night. I was the youngest person there, but it felt good to just be interacting with other people and to get a break from the constant whirring of my mind.
 
V

VintageRabbit

Guest
I'm proud of you and glad you had fun!
I'm in the same situation. Looking for a
Home church.....
 
prairiechick

prairiechick

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Thank you, both of you. I ACTUALLY had another good day today! It's amazing! I haven't felt this good since December--ACTUALLY GOOD! This is the first full day that I haven't felt weighed down by depression. I went to church this morning and DIDN'T cry. Not one single tear. I didn't even feel like I was going to cry. And I talked with people afterward and smiled REAL smiles, not fake smiles where you smile because you are supposed to smile. And then I came home and worked for a good 2 1/2 hours on my presentation that I will be doing in class on Wed. evening, and it was PRODUCTIVE. For so long my brain has been slow and my mind sluggish, but I felt like I was working at a more normal pace today and actually accomplishing something. Then I went for a walk with my mom and had supper with her, and thank God she didn't press me to talk about the memories of abuse by the babysitter, and then I came home. I actually did things today instead of sitting in my apartment feeling too depressed to get dressed or do normal, everyday things. I really, really hope this means I am on the up and up, because the last few months have been HELL.
 
V

VintageRabbit

Guest
I wish I could do that. I really do.
I'm just not in the right place.
I really admire you and smiled when
I read your post. That's where I
Need to be.
 
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