New to SH forum....

[Lex]

I won’t go into all the detail but SH has been a major issue for over a year. The extent of injuries has resulted in what may be permanent loss of function in a limb.

My Consultant (UK hospital) is getting suspicious- my wounds no longer make sense. I’m really stressed now that my Dr will ‘know’ and is going to be angry with me. I’m scared, tired, sore and fed up. I don’t want to be back in hospital, I don’t want the hurt (somedays I do)

I find it difficult to control when overwhelmed. All my anger is turned in on me. Everything I do wrong means I deserve this. Most stress is coming from being really worried Dr is going to be angry and upset with me (I’ve never ever said that I had made things worse through SH so feigning that I have no idea why things get worse with Consultant)

what can I do? Will my Consultant stop treating me? Will they be angry at me? If I keep saying I don’t know why - will they just think me as a liar?
They’ve taken tissue sample to check microbiology and histology, will that show them that I’m SH? I’m quite stressed

 

[Passionflower]

Do they not know that your wounds are from self harm?

 

[TheSadnessWillLastForever]

I dont think they would stop treating you, but if they know the cause they might recommend psychiatric/psychological help. I dont know for sure bit that would be my guess

 

[Lex]

Do they not know that your wounds are from self harm?

No they don’t know ... my SH is quite involved...with reasonable stories that could explain what’s happening. Only it’s getting harder to explain. I don’t know why I create this ‘world’ around me but in it I’m doing things that hurt and make me ill.

 

[Lex]

I dont think they would stop treating you, but if they know the cause they might recommend psychiatric/psychological help. I dont know for sure bit that would be my guess

I’m scared to tell them. I’m scared of being found-out. I’m scared it will hurt my partner. I could get treatment and be okay from current wounds if I can just stop SH. I’m more stressed that Consultant is going to be angry with me - even without saying anything - but because they will ‘find out’ I must be hurting myself....

 

[midnightphoenix]

they won't be angry at you

 

[Lex]

they won't be angry at you

Thank you.
I’ll just have to see how it goes. I don’t think I’m ready to say anything and still stressed!

Also I miss-titled this post, I have posted here before I didn’t mean to mislead anyone :-(