• Welcome! It’s great to see you. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

New to here but not new to mental health

V

vegemite

New member
Joined
May 9, 2009
Messages
2
Hi,
I'm vegemite, I just thought I would say Hi. I have had depression on and off, mostly reactive, over the years. Last serious bout started in October- I was trying to fix a marriage that I couldn't, and tried to end it. Soon after I found out the reasons- my husband was having an affair.

After 14 years, I found myself as a single mum of a four year old. Her dad is great with her, he sees her twice a week. I feel so alone and everytime i pick myself up and get stronger something knocks me back. I still work after having three months off but when my little one is at school and i have a day off, or when she is with her dad, i hide under the duvet. I guess I would liken myself to a robot in that respect. I am "on" when my little one is here, but close my eyes and switch off when she isn't. It has been a difficult divorce and the latest is the "other womans" husband has tracked me down to try to get to them, and threatens to hurt my husband- my little girls dad.

I do have good support and my friends are angels. I also have a practice mental health nurse I see, and my gp is lovely.

I am on 60mg/ day flouxetine, nitrazepam when needed, and was on diazepam as well but have stopped that (unfortunately replaced by smoking!)

I do have the ability to get "projects" going like decorating or planning a trip, and get on a real high about these then burn out and go low again- my current worry is keeping the mortgage on for the sake of some stability for me and my little girl. I am lucky my job pays quite well but it doesn't look like I can take on all of the mortgage myself.

I just want everything to be normal, why does this happen to people?

vegemite
 
D

Dollit

Guest
I think normal (for me anyway) is when you get to travel a route through life that does as little damage as possible.

Divorce is difficult when there's kids involved and it's not exactly a picnic without them. It seems to be made extra difficult some days.

There is light at the end of the tunnel though - I saw it once and took a photo of it just to remind myself it wasn't really a train.

Glad to see you here and you couldn't have found a more supportive place.
 
V

vegemite

New member
Joined
May 9, 2009
Messages
2
thankyou dollit!

it is such a difficult thing to go through and I am wised up enough to seek help where I need it, so when I have those dark thoughts, or start making plans, I know to reach out- hence coming on here. thankyou so much
x
 
keepsafe

keepsafe

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 15, 2008
Messages
13,623
Hello Veggi

Welcome - Hope you find support here - I am sure you will.
Hope things work ok better for you soon
KS
 
nickh

nickh

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Feb 14, 2008
Messages
1,428
Location
Birmingham UK
Hi and :welcome: to the Forum - hope you can find some support and encouragement here.

Nick.
 
Top