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New to Forum not to depression

I

Itsgoodtotalk

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Joined
Dec 1, 2014
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5
Hi,

I'm new to this forum and decided to join because I have suffered from depression for years. I have been through the lows so many times that I now notice the warning signs of another episode coming on and today is one of those days, therefore, I am taking a new approach to overcoming this one.

I am on medication that I have been taking for about a year solid as previously I never stuck to taking them. I also start CBT later on this week to try and overcome my demons one and for all. I don't ever think that'll I'll be rid of this horrible illness but need new ways of living with it. I have suffered from this since the age of 13 and I am now 31.

It's hard to talk about because it's such a complicated illness and it has taken me years to start to understand it and even admit to myself that I have it. I used to feel so embarrassed about it and would never open up but that led to me taking two overdoses, so really hasn't done any good keeping things to myself. I am now a lot more open about things which makes it so much easier when I know I'm starting to feel poorly.

Family members try to be supportive but nobody really understands what it's like to live it, it tires you out having a constant battle with your thoughts and feelings. I am still learning and trying to find new was to cope which is what led me to here. It has already helped my mood today reading some of the posts.
 
katya

katya

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Dec 4, 2013
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Location
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Really glad you've joined the forum. :)

I'm in a similar situation to you - I suffer from depression, have been on anti-depressants for nearly a year solid after taking them sporadically for a while, and I'm waiting for CBT. I've found the forum really helps because you quickly realise there are people out there who understand what you're going through and there are people here to talk to.

I hope you'll be able to communicate your feelings with the people you know in real life too - hopefully CBT and your increasing ability to open up will make that happen. :)

Welcome!

Feel free to PM me if you would ever like. :)
 
Mayfair

Mayfair

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:welcome: to the forums Itsgoodtotalk :)
 
I

Itsgoodtotalk

Member
Joined
Dec 1, 2014
Messages
5
Thank you.

It does help knowing that there are people going through similar things, it's hard when you try to talk to people who have never experienced it as you spend most of the time trying to explain how you feel rather than why you feel the way you do.

Hopefully CBT will help. I've had therapy before but again I put on such a poker face that I was just wasting everyone's time really, this time though I'm going for it as I need it to work.
 
katya

katya

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That's good; you have to go into it with the desire to really engage with it (or so I've been told). Sounds like it'll be good for you.

It's a that shame such a widely spread illness is still so seldom spoken about in any depth.
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

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Aug 17, 2012
Messages
13,529
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Welcome to the forum. :hi:
There are lots of us here who can truly understand how you've felt and are still feeling. I hope you find it useful being on the forum.
 
H

hex76

New member
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Dec 1, 2014
Messages
3
I am right there too....nobody really gets our battle....I'm 38 and been dealing undiagnosed until recently.
 
Purple Chaos

Purple Chaos

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Oct 23, 2014
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Hi Itsgoodtotalk

Sorry to hear you are having a crappy time. It does feel like a constant battle but it's good that you are trying to find new ways to help yourself through it.

Anyway, welcome to the forum. I hope you find it helpful and supportive
 
C

clyde

Active member
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Dec 1, 2014
Messages
43
Welcome itsgoodtotalk! I've been in depression when I'm withdrawing alcohol. It's very difficult that's why I know how you feel
 
I

Itsgoodtotalk

Member
Joined
Dec 1, 2014
Messages
5
Thank you all for being so welcome.

Not that I would wish this on anyone I am so pleased to hear that others are and have gone though the same as me, it can be such a lonely illness.

I struggled and was really quite ill for years, I do still suffer but I am trying to manage it. It's not easy and seen myself having to move back in with my mam 2 years ago because I was too poorly to live on my own but I am trying hard to call upon people when I need it instead of letting myself go on the downward spiral and landing myself back in hospital. Thats one of the reasons for joining here.

Got my first CBT session tomorrow so looking forward to seeing how this is going to work, I'm going in open minded and hoping for the best.
 
Purple Chaos

Purple Chaos

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You're sounding positive, which is great.

I think it can be difficult to get your head around reaching out for help and sometimes even recognising when we need help. I know this has been an issue for me in the past but it's worth persevering with. It's something I'm working on at the moment.

I hope your CBT session goes well. Let us know how you get on
 
katya

katya

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Hi, hope you're feeling better today. You've made a really positive step with going to CBT, so you should be really proud of that. :)
 
I

Itsgoodtotalk

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Joined
Dec 1, 2014
Messages
5
Hi,

Thank you, I'm not sure how I feel about it. I don't know what I expected but it was just like any other session i have had in the past. I'm hoping after that initial session it they can start to help me.

She was going to talk to her colleague as she thought a few EMDR sessions would help me too. I had never heard of it before but she told me it was therapy using eye movements....?

Will wait and see what they recommend.
 
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