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New to all this.......... (bloody long post, sorry)

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PurpleNewy

Member
Joined
Aug 23, 2009
Messages
6
Location
South Wales
Hi sorry for bothering you all, but I'm new to all this forum thing and I need help/advise.
I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and BiPolar last year. This came after 8 years of being on and off anti depressants and seeing counsellors. A lot of stuff has made sense since I was diagnosed but I am really struggling to come to terms with these 'labels' as I see them.
I was diagnosed after a 10 minute appointment with a psychiatrist and was offered Depakote whilst I was taking Prozac at the same time. I was in complete denial and came off Prozac and have not taken any medication since. I started seeing a psychologist a few months ago and she says I'm making progress and she's all for going slowly.
I have talked about a lot of my demons and and more recently a problem I have with food. I have been diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and I'm seeing a dietician for the mental health community.
The problem is I feel like I am coping less and less. I hold down a full time job and I'm married. My husband and my family really don't understand what is going on in my head and everything irritates me, leading to arguments etc. 5 weeks ago my GP signed me off work for 4 weeks with work related stress. I am coming to the end of this time and need to back to the GP, but I'm so scared that I can't go back. I don't feel like I can work anymore.
My husband and I have discussed I go part time (3 days a week) but I know we wouldn't cope financially with this, but I also know I would feel so much better mentally. I feel like I need life to slow down so I can get myself in order.
I really don't want to take medication, but I am getting so scared of life and worry all the time. I'm scared I'm going to fail, not go back to work, loose my job, my house and end up bankrupt and alone. I seem to be shutting everyone out more and more and hate going out of the house.
Sorry, but I feel like I had no where else to turn.
 
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Apotheosis

Guest
Welcome to the site.

It would appear, whatever our situations, that a lot of us have issues with meds, & fears/apprehensions with the future, & with finding it hard to find people that really understand.

Sometimes meds can help - sometimes they don't. It is your decision as to whether you think that may best help, & a balance as to whether meds could make things easier for you.

Hope that you find support & understanding on the site.
 
intelgal

intelgal

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Mar 17, 2008
Messages
1,413
Location
Yorkshire
I was very brielfy prescibed depekote.. was not the right drug for me;

SOunds like you ve got a lot on your plate.. have you been referred for support or have another appointment with the psych where you can talk things over again
 
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PurpleNewy

Member
Joined
Aug 23, 2009
Messages
6
Location
South Wales
I'm seeing the psychologist every 2/3 weeks for therapy. I haven't seen the psychiatrist since the appointment last year. I went to my GP a couple of months ago when I started to decline and he contacted my psychiatrist who offered Depakote again without seeing me. My GP tried to call me and tell me this, but got my answer phone and wouldn't leave a message. I thought nothing was being done- my psychologist then let me see my file and I found this out. It surprises me that psychiatrists can do this and therefore I hold no faith in the NHS system where I live. They let me loose with a diagnosis and no information, a perscription of Depakote, no follow up appointment and no contact until the psychologist offered an initial appointment 8 months later!
 
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