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New member... feeling kind of stuck in life

D

down

Member
Joined
Nov 1, 2020
Messages
5
Location
Texas
Hello guys. I joined this forum to seek advice and kind words from people who have been past this kind of stuff. Currently a junior in college, but its looking like i will lose my aid due to bad grades. (engineering). I feel I stress myself out so much everyday and I overthink alot. Example last night for halloween I had a good time with friends ... but then I get agitated as is my personality and i get stuck in this mood and leave myself out of the group and i can tell people notice. Im just so judgemental and tense its killing me in. Had what im sure was a panic attack last weekend, and earlier I felt nasueas and light headed thinking about how im so awkard socially that it prompted me to find help (this forum i guess). The thing that weighs on me the most is how i come from a poor family, i want to be succesful for them, im smart but im so lazy i did this to myself. Im scared of being judged myself ironically so i guess thats where it stems from. The other night I coulnt really sleep till 5 am.. Not even thinking things but I know its from the overload of stress in the "background" Can someone offer me something??please
 
jajingna

jajingna

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 31, 2020
Messages
4,495
Location
Canada
Welcome to the forum, you'll find some supportive people here.
 
calypso

calypso

Well-known member
Admin
Moderator
Joined
Jan 5, 2011
Messages
57,061
Location
Lancashire
:welcome: to the forum. What is it that underlies your stress? You say you are lazy but I suspect you aren't, its just so much energy is taken up with anxiety. It sounds as though you need to find a way to understand what lies beneath the problems you suffer from. Have you ever considered therapy of any kind? I don't know what its like in Texas for that. I hope you find supportive people on here.
 
D

down

Member
Joined
Nov 1, 2020
Messages
5
Location
Texas
:welcome: to the forum. What is it that underlies your stress? You say you are lazy but I suspect you aren't, its just so much energy is taken up with anxiety. It sounds as though you need to find a way to understand what lies beneath the problems you suffer from. Have you ever considered therapy of any kind? I don't know what its like in Texas for that. I hope you find supportive people on here.
Honestly im bad at self analazying at the moment, but im about to get help from Better Now counseling. But my guess is School and failing, and having to dropout im trrriified of my moms reaction, that reaction being disappointment. And you are right I am not lazy. Im genuinely on the smarter end but I hate schoolwork... I just hate i got myself into this now im too shame to dropout...
 
B

bpd2020

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
May 25, 2020
Messages
7,535
Location
England
Hello Down. Welcome to the forum. :)
 
calypso

calypso

Well-known member
Admin
Moderator
Joined
Jan 5, 2011
Messages
57,061
Location
Lancashire
Can you change course? To something you like? I changed when I was initially was training as a teacher and realised it wasn't for me. Just a thought, I don't know what your place will be like. I suspect your mum will be disappointed initially but would want you happy.
 
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