• Welcome! It’s great to see you.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

New Here

M

MerDreamer

Active member
Joined
Jan 2, 2021
Messages
32
Location
Chicago, IL
Hi,
I’m Merdreamer. New here. Just wanted to introduce myself. I struggle with anorexia and schizophrenia as well as self harming behaviors. Currently in treatment been such for the past 15 years. Leaving in about six to eight months. Would like to make some friends as well as get used to talking to people about my mental illness that aren’t professionals. And of course help wherever I can. Thanks for reading. Hope you are all doing well.
 
OmniscientNihilist

OmniscientNihilist

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 9, 2020
Messages
1,648
Location
Canada
Please upload your mind into the database for analysis.


 
kimidare

kimidare

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 2, 2021
Messages
80
Location
France
Hi Merdreamer,
:welcome:

I didn't experience schizophrenia or anorexia, just PTSD and self harm. If you want to discuss, don t hesitate to send me a message, I would like some friends too 😺.

Have a nice night/day
 
soul searching

soul searching

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 5, 2020
Messages
765
Location
Clearwater, Florida
Welcome Merdreamer! I have paranoid schizophrenia. Feel free to talk anytime.
 
UpnDwn1978

UpnDwn1978

Well-known member
Forum Guide
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Jun 16, 2020
Messages
5,347
Location
Norway
Hi Merdreamer welcome to the forum :welcome:
 
M

MerDreamer

Active member
Joined
Jan 2, 2021
Messages
32
Location
Chicago, IL
Thank you all for your welcomes!
Yeah “kimidare” and “soul searching” I believe I actually have PTSD from the rapes I mentioned on the eating disorder thread but my docs said schizophrenia because I didn’t present them with the evidence I had when I had it. Now it’s lost. So they don’t believe me. I get the impression they want to call me too ugly to be raped. Which is bullshit. I didn’t come in here to be called ugly and broken down. So I’m probably going to sue for misdiagnosis. I already showed them a picture of me and the rapist together at prom....which when I show them his public records with his birthdate they will see he was older than me and shouldn’t have been with me that night. I secretly think he paid the hospitals to medicate and sedate me and that my pedophile mom did the same.....argh it’s just so frustrating.
 
soul searching

soul searching

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 5, 2020
Messages
765
Location
Clearwater, Florida
HI MerDreamer! This sounds awful. No wonder you are so upset! If you have PTSD, it is a very serious condition and you'll need professional help . Appearance of course should not be an issue. I'm not a professional and you might not want to hear this but it does seem possible that you may have schizophrenia. Try to keep an open mind so that you can get well. In any case, I know you are suffering, and I feel for you.
 
M

MerDreamer

Active member
Joined
Jan 2, 2021
Messages
32
Location
Chicago, IL
What seems like schizophrenia about it? I mean I asked my doctor if he could see the other person in the picture with me and I’ve asked several people if they could see him too they all said yes and described him to me just as I saw him without me giving hints. Is there something I don’t know about you Americans? Seems like you’re all covering up some sort of large pedophilia case because me just mentioning rape seems to cause everyone of you guys to tell me it isn’t real. Like that never happens! nope!everyone just makes it up! Or like you’re all saying you had better keep quiet about that. Something you people want to confess to Mother Britain?
 
E

EclipticNight

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2020
Messages
291
Location
Orleans vermont.
Howdy MerDreamer. Ive done quite a bit of self harm, have a sleep disorder, bipolar depression, anxiety and ptsd. Feel free to chat any time, i like using my experiences to help others.
 
kimidare

kimidare

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 2, 2021
Messages
80
Location
France
Thank you all for your welcomes!
Yeah “kimidare” and “soul searching” I believe I actually have PTSD from the rapes I mentioned on the eating disorder thread but my docs said schizophrenia because I didn’t present them with the evidence I had when I had it. Now it’s lost. So they don’t believe me. I get the impression they want to call me too ugly to be raped. Which is bullshit. I didn’t come in here to be called ugly and broken down. So I’m probably going to sue for misdiagnosis. I already showed them a picture of me and the rapist together at prom....which when I show them his public records with his birthdate they will see he was older than me and shouldn’t have been with me that night. I secretly think he paid the hospitals to medicate and sedate me and that my pedophile mom did the same.....argh it’s just so frustrating.
I see. We feel very alone when nobody trust us. The proofs are essential for the professionals. It's normal I suppose to avoid putting innocents in prison. But it is very frustrating when it's not an innocent and he just freely go away while you are struggling.
I don't know for your diagnostic, I m not a psychiatrist.

During the procedure when I filed a complaint against my rapist, they send me to a psychiatrist for an analyse (to try to detect if I was lying). He told me to summarize the case because it was too long to read. Then in a few sentences he diagnosed me borderline with an aggravated depression.
I don't even know why borderline exactly, so I ignored this part. The depression part didn't require to be a specialist to be noticed...

Maybe you could meet other therapists to see if they have the same diagnosis if it's important for you.

So for me they believe me (the rapist told them that all was true except it was my fantasm to be raped...). But due to the lack of physical proofs (because it was a year ago), they closed the case. And the rapist is happily living his life.

The most important is your recovery, not what the others think about you.
I hope you will feel better :grouphug:
 
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