New, and nervous

[a_wolf]

Hi! I'm new to this forum and I'm worried about going to the doctor (finally). I've been doing my research, and although I can't be sure until the doctor examines me or whatever, I'm getting really suspicious that I might be bipolar. I have a family history of it (great-grandpa and my cousin) and I've never been able to get a handle on myself.

I'm mostly worried about the first meetings with the doctor and how to go about getting them to pass me on to a psychologist (I'm fairly certain I at least need a specialist's examination There's something wrong with me ). How did you feel at your first appointments? How did it go?

Some days I feel like I'm just being whiny and should just get going w/o any professionals' help. There's ten-year-olds in Africa that are the oldest left in their town due to AIDS, and they keep going! Yeah, I know thats some mighty guilt-trip speaking, but does anyone else feel this? How do you deal with it?

 

[Kat667]

I'm new and nervous too. Seeing doctor on Monday after my family telling me to see one for years. Am worried when I read of side effects of medication. My husband isn't exactly sympathetic but I just cant handle living as I do any longer. It's a roller coaster I thought of as normal, yet it's ruining my life so need to do something. I didn't want to admit I had problems, muddled through until now, since my late teens early twenties.

 

[loonatoon]

Hi a_wolf

I just wanted to say welcome to the forum, I'm pretty new myself and it was great to feel support and read about everyones experiences when I joined.

I personally dont know whats wrong with me although I have been to the Drs and been prescribed anti-depressants. I'm not sure if theyre making me feel better or the happiness I have on the 'good days' is going slightly manic, when spending lots of money etc. who knows, im just awaiting a referral to someone i can talk to about everything.

The best bit of advice i have been given is to not over analyse yourself.

Do not feel you have to label yourself however, I appreciate you want an answer as to why youre feeling the way you are.

Say whatevers on your mind, we're all here to listen.

Going to the DRs was extremely nerve-racking but the relief afterwards when I knew I had taken that important first step to try and stop the constant up and downs in my life, well it has to be a positive thing!

Hope youre doing ok today

Bex X

 

[a_wolf]

Thanks! I am ok today, anxious to get this thing over with (and to get my xmas shopping done! )

I try not to over-analyze too much, but it is very difficult. I actually think it has become its own sort of coping mechanism

Yeah, the drugs kind of scare me too. The side-effects are horrible But I am reserving judgment indefinitely, hopefully my doctor knows what she's doing (new doctor, so I don't even have a guess...).

Best to ya'! Hope you figure ur meds out.

 

[corrado444]

New and nervous

Good luck to you. I have personally never experienced this nervousness, but my wife did.
For me, getting a diagnosis wasn't such a big deal. If you are going to the doc is for a reason. That reason is not going to change after seeing the doctor. You are just going to come out of there with a new label and a prescription, but the underlying illness is there regardless of who you see.

For my wife it was instead a very traumatic experience. She could not believe she could be sick, but the symptoms were undeniable by then. She thought those things happened to "other people".

In reality, we are all a bit screwed up. To different degrees to be sure but I have never met a totally "sane" person.

As for the meds, yes, the side effects are not fun. Some people will need to stay on the meds forever and suffer the effects, others may be lucky, like I was. When I was first put on Prozac it was like a veil was lifted from my eyes. I was able to see reality in a totally different light.

Eventually, I stopped taking prozac but by then I had learned to control my depression by other means. Certainly it's still an issue, and some days are harder than others, but all in all I am able to overcome the difficulties and eventually realize that the worse is over.

My wife on the other hand is one of the unlucky ones. She has to stay on meds or risk dissociating from reality. I cannot fathom the fear and horror she must be going through, but I am trying to help as much as I can and hopefully joining this forum (I am sort of the advance party) will help her.

I hope the best for you too.

 

[keepsafe]

to the forum by the way

 

[a_wolf]

That's the feelings I had: This doesn't happen to me. I hope your wife is doing well. Kudos to her for having the bravery to face it.

It took me a long time in denial, but the deed will be done tuesday morning. Even though I have met and highly respected people I knew had psychological disorders, its 'supposed to be different for me'.

So I hope she comes to terms with her diagnosis, but I understand it's easier to extend the sentiment to others than to yourself. She's not alone in that.

 

[corrado444]

It is hard to face one's illness

Thank you for the kindness. I hope your experience won't bee too bad and I think that by coming here and talking to others you have already done more than many people do to lessen the blow.

I also wish you the best in finding a doctor that is willing and able to help. That's my biggest complaint about mental professionals. Many seem way to detached and distracted.
I hope you'll find yourself in the hands of a good doctor.

 

[ghost989]

New too

Hi A_Wolf, after a lot of persuasion and battling a lot of self denial I actually managed to get in to see a decent psychiatrist today was diagnosed with rapid cycling bipolar.

For me there's 2 sides to this:

1: A certain sense of relief that there's actually something wrong with me that can be treated rather than me just being randomly odd.

2: A huge amount of fear as to what's in store for me over the next however long.

I'm still getting a hang of what this means and I'll let you know how things go as I get on!

I really hope you find the answers you're looking for. Don't be afraid of going to see a doctor. The worst he can say is there's a problem and we'll get you help.

 

[a_wolf]

Thanks! It's great to have people to talk to about this. Here's an update.

Well, I didn't have any problem getting a referral from a GP today I was so nervous I was stuttering and speed-talking and crumpling papers up in my hand.

My doctor was understanding and gently pressured me to keep talking. So I get to see a psychiatrist in about a month and a half hopefully. It really feels better knowing that I've done something, lets hope the psychiatrist is good; I really only have one option where I live.

Congrats on getting a good psychiatrist! I know how hard it is to say anything to a doctor when you don't feel comfortable.