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New and hopeless

L

LostCara

New member
Joined
Nov 1, 2015
Messages
4
Location
Ormond Beach, FL
Hi,
I married a man this year after knowing him for only 2 months. So incredibly dumb. He was PERFECT. That all ended after the wedding. Found out this year that he's been married before (and still legally is!), has multiple children he doesn't know, was a major drug addict and has been on Suboxone for years, to stay off the other drugs. Lied about having his contractor's license, lies DAILY, breaks promises all of the time, doesn't honor debts, and is just a miserable nasty person. I think I'm grieving the man he pretended to be. I left him and I all his stupid money and am now back at my parent's house at 35 years old. I have an Autistic son. I love him dearly. He's the only reason I haven't killed myself. I have no skills, no job, and no friends. I have failed in this game of life. Thank you for listening. I used to be witty and fun. Now I'm just so broken. Peace to all of you.
 
C

cloudy9

Guest
Welcome to the site LostCara, peace to you too. Real sorry to hear about what happened, very sad, but I'm glad you have your son with you. Sorry you were tricked by your husband. I'm certain there are people on this site who have experienced similar things and are dealing with the aftermath of such experiences, and I'm also sure you'll find some good supports here. Thank you. You take care.
 

MarlieeB

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Jan 15, 2013
Messages
25,044
:welcome: to the forum.

It's horrible when someone leads you along, especially when you fall head over heels with them. It is understandable that you are grieving the man who fell for and married. I'm just sorry it has all gone so badly for you but I'm glad that you are now out of there :hug1:

I think it might be an idea to try and get a annulment if you are still within a decent amount of time because I would say you have pretty good terms to do it, especially with the fact he is still legally married to someone else.

I'm glad you do have someone to live for. You haven't failed, we are all going to hit some bumps along the way just that sometimes some people hit massive bumps, like you have.

You are 35 years old, you still have so much more you can do with your life and you also have your son and trust me, bringing up a child certainly isn't a failure!

We are a fantastic bunch on this forum with good listening ears.

Marliee xxx
 
A

Agnes

Member
Joined
Nov 1, 2015
Messages
5
Location
USA
Hi Cara I'm new here, too...
You have not failed - just the opposite - you have moved forward by leaving this person who misled you! That's a huge positive step.
You are only 35! Still young! But even if you were 75 it's never too late to make a new start - may sound trite but it's true. Do not blame yourself for this man lying to you. It is not because of anything you did or did not do. This kind of person is often very, very good at duping others. He may be a sociopath and they thrive on it. Right now you are in shock but by leaving him you are already taking charge of caring for yourself and your son and that is not failure, that is strength. It WILL get better.
Take care
 
Last edited:
Nikita

Nikita

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Jun 20, 2015
Messages
4,860
:welcome:LostCara

You have been through a terrible ordeal,to be deceived that way is dreadful.Well done for finding out the truth and leaving him.You might feel broken right now but you will heal and it will all come good for the better.
I wish you and your son all the best.I hope the forum helps you and that you enjoy it here.Nikitax
 
L

LostCara

New member
Joined
Nov 1, 2015
Messages
4
Location
Ormond Beach, FL
Thank you all so much. He was always telling me that other women wouldn't care about these things. Ridiculous! Trying to make me feel like I was crazy. Your encouraging words mean so much and are greatly appreciated.
 
A

Agnes

Member
Joined
Nov 1, 2015
Messages
5
Location
USA
Always trust your own feelings and instincts and you can not give wrong!
 
L

LostCara

New member
Joined
Nov 1, 2015
Messages
4
Location
Ormond Beach, FL
You are all so correct. I have the blinders off now. Good point about trusting the gut! It never fails. Going to use this time to meditate, spend time with my son, focus on all I have to be grateful for, and finally FIND myself. You all are so kind. Thanks again:)
 
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