• Welcome! It’s great to see you. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

New, and feeling like I've hit a dead end.

R

RestlessAffect

Member
Joined
Sep 4, 2009
Messages
8
Location
NW England
Hi, I'm in my early twenties and feeling kinda lost.

I've suffered with recurring depression for a long time, and I was recently diagnosed with General Anxiety Disorder. Which explains a fair amount of what I've been feeling, but not everything.

I was Agoraphobic and didn't go outside once in the past two years, and had real trouble leaving the house for much of the three years before those. However, I've overcome that in leaps and bounds over the last few months, as a result of having one extremely supportive (online) friend, and through sheer determination too. Feels great when I'm out, but it's not helping me to feel any better overall.

Since then, my moods have been getting increasingly more dramatic. Now I'm at the point where I'm constantly shifting between severe depression and being over excited, and completely agitated at any other time. And none of these are exclusive in themselves. For example, I could be laughing excessively at something, so much so that I'm crying with laughter (happens A lot), and be seriously annoyed at the same time.

I always thought my "Ups and downs" were normal for me, but not hey're so pervasive, I don't feel normal very often at all. And I'm exhausting my friend (who is bipolar II) completely.

I've been prescribed antidepressants, but I have my reasons for not taking that particular type (SSRI). I asked for alternatives but was told just to try them. And that if things got worse, to go back and see my doctor. I know things could get much worse, but they're bad enough at the moment and I'm scared of what may happen if I take them. There have been quite a number of times that I've felt suicidal, but never got to the point where I've made an attempt. Thankfully.

I brought up my concern over the possibility that I may have some form of mood disorder with my doctor (my friend believes bipolar), but I don't want to jump to any conclusions.

My family are of no support.

And the doctor seems to be ignoring me.

But I'm determined to move forward. I just don't know how. :unsure:

This is pretty a pretty full-on introduction, right? Sorry. :(
 
A

Ainsworth

Guest
:welcome:

hi, IMO you sound like you are in a mixed state mood, they can be hell, ive been there :(
 
Q

quality factor

Guest
Hi there and :welcome: to the forum,hope you
fing it a helpful place to be.

QF.
 
companion

companion

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Jul 30, 2008
Messages
124
Location
Manchester, UK
Hi RestlessAffect and :welcome:

It sounds like you are experiencing a confusing, difficult, and sometimes lonely time. This forum is a good place to meet new people who do understand what you are saying, without judgment or prejudice.

Sometimes it can help talking through your feelings and thoughts with someone who is not directly related to your situation. That is where this forum is great. It is of great help to many people.

If you need anything, you only need to ask.

Take care and hopefully will see you about the forums soon.

Companion (y)
 
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