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Never diagnosed with any personality disorder though recently self sabotage my happiness

bluestar ocean

bluestar ocean

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 4, 2020
Messages
106
Location
london
Incident happened recently. I at a patio bar which I go to with a friend I'm single and hetro. A girl that I talked to last year is there with your friend 40s I'm in my 50s. When we walked in she started talking a lot with her friend looked Excited to see me. My friend are Usually does a running commentary what's going on around us, started to do a running commentary/\. He said they're looking at you they like you did talking about you. Somehow that went to my head and actually fell my ego get inflated. For the rest of the night I turned my back to her acting superior. And I made a story in my head I sent you an email last year and she didn't reply that's I'm not going over to talk to them. I couldn't figure out why I wasn't coming over problem was. To them I was the guy who hit on her last year. I stuck with my victim my story for Not getting an email reply and never went over. As time went on I can go over because I was too shy and had approach anxiety. In the end she left with her friend very upset and consulted and rejected. Why did I get that bellicose and Grandiose feeling. I created a victimization story to reject or against my best interest. I basically self sabotaged myself
 
Tawny

Tawny

Well-known member
Staff member
Forum Guide
Joined
Nov 10, 2019
Messages
13,582
Location
England
I don't know, but these things happen.

We cannot beat ourselves up every time we do, think or feel something wrong. We can only plan to do better next time.

Anxiety can have a major impact on life. Just do your best, that is all you can do. Learn from mistakes, accept you aren't perfect. This is your life, try to make it a nice one for yourself.

You don't need to have a diagnosis to write here, please keep writing as it is a friendly place and many of us know how you are feeling and have been through similar.
 
LittleMissNameless

LittleMissNameless

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 2, 2019
Messages
736
Location
canada
Sounds pretty normal. This type of self sabotage is pretty normal it's being stopped by anxiety for some reason. You just need to push through and try to be present in the moment.
 
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