Need some support --- loaded & lengthy post

[h_put2021]

Hi everyone,

A couple of weeks ago I was in a very bad manic/mixed episode w/ bad disassociation and overdosed 3 times....I was finally committed for a week for psychological help and finally my meds and regimen are working and I'm stable.

But the thing is, I am now finally in a space to sort through everything that happened and picking up the pieces of my life. My memory of the events are pretty limited and I have a lot of things that I just do not remember (which is terrifying).


This weekend I am going back home finally (with someone there to support me), but I am nervous about how being there will make me feel... given all the events that took place. I'm also upset because I caused so much damage to myself and scared my loved ones. I just don't want them to leave me because of this. I've been reassured they aren't and they just want me to be better but I can't shake that fear.

 

[JessisMe]

Hi there I’m sorry for the manic episode you went through. I am also bipolar and I know how scary they can be too. It is terrific that you have a supportive family around you. From what you have said they clearly care about you so I wouldn’t hesitate to lean on them throughout your recovery. How can we best support you?

 

[h_put2021]

Hi there I’m sorry for the manic episode you went through. I am also bipolar and I know how scary they can be too. It is terrific that you have a supportive family around you. From what you have said they clearly care about you so I wouldn’t hesitate to lean on them throughout your recovery. How can we best support you?

Just validation or advice of any kind

 

[Blue Opal]

It is scary to not remember most of what happened to you while manic. I understand, I've been there. But you can only ask the people who were around you. What helped me was to remember I wasn't myself and that is what my boyfriend at the time also said. You had no control, nothing that happened was on purpose. It wasn't your fault.
Good to hear your meds are working. Now it is time to rest and recover.