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Need more support from boyfriend

A

Ash97

Former member
I'm in a long term relationship, and suffer from depression and anxiety. At the beginning of my relationship my boyfriend helped through every step. We've been through long distance. We've lived together in my parents house and we just recently moved into a place of our own together, but since we have I find he is less supportive. I don't feel like I can talk about how I'm feeling etc. I'm not sure why... He's always busy, tired or just adds his own problems or some unhealthy coping mechanisms, he suffers from depression and ptsd also. Right now I'm struggling. I'm in college, my exams are in a couple of weeks, my counsellor is sick, and im suffering from recurring nightmares, i need him. Anyone have any similar experiences or advice? Ive tried to explain things to him, how I'm feeling, but i just feel pushed aside.
 
Nikita

Nikita

Former member
Joined
Jun 20, 2015
Messages
4,860
Ash:welcome:

It seems like you are having a really difficult time,I am sorry for what you are going through.
It does seem hard that your boyfriend isn't emotionally present for you at this time.Normally that would be a bad sign.But you have explained that he himself suffers from depression and ptsd too and those are two things I suffer from so I know how hard it is to keep yourself together with those issues and honestly it ids difficult and impossible to get through and have someone else with mental health issues lean on you too.
That may be why your boyfriend can't be there for you.

You are struggling nonetheless,so need to find support,just don't expect your boyfriend to provide it,it isn't realistic given what he is coping with already.You need to find another counsellor if yours is sick.Try herbal remedies for the nightmareshttp://renegadehealth.com/blog/2012/09/03/herbs-to-help-fight-nightmares
Hopefully getting proper sleep without nightmares will help get you through your exams,sleep is very important without enough decent sleep we will feel awful and be unable to cope.

Perhaps you need to have a conversation with your boyfriend letting him know you are in a sink or swim situation and are struggling badly and you may need him to watch out for you and say you aren't going to lean on him due to the problems he himself is dealing with but that you need him to be aware that you are struggling too and want some emotional input and support from him even if it is very little.I know you have already tried this,but do it again and this time stress there will be other consequences if he ignores you and then apply whatever penalties you think would apply.

I hope everything works out well for you.Nikitax
 

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