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Need help, not sure what to do



New member
May 7, 2019
So for the past 3 years i'm pretty sure i've been depressed, i dont find hobbies as fun anymore, i stay up until atleast 2am on school days, when i dont have school ill be up until atleast 6am and then i sleep for 12 hours and wake up still feeling groggy/drained(i've tried sleeping for 6,8 and 10 hours too but feel just as drained), i have no appetite, constipation and terrible hygiene, and just never really feel happy(or sad, not sure why). So last week i went to the doctor and told them about it and they thought it might be an underactive thyroid(which runs in my family) so i had a blood test and started to get my hopes up as if i actually did have an underactive thyroid i could take medication and stop feeling so drained but the results came back today and I have nothing wrong with my thyroid, they told me to seek counselling, but i dont want to go counselling for a few reasons, first is i cant be bothered, i have no energy, i have trouble getting out of bed, i cant study and im always sleepy, second is that there is no reason for all this to be happening, i have plenty of friends, come from a above average family, my parents are kind and buy me pretty much anything, i have no reason to feel like this at all so i doubt counselling would actually help, and the third reason is that i dont want to be seen going to counselling. So what do i do? My hope of having an underactive thyroid and all this being over is gone and i dont want to go counselling and i cant get prescribed antidepressants, so is there anyway to get myself out of this pit and get my life back together alone? I just get angry at myself now and hate myself for not being able to study, not being able to sleep for 8 hours, not being able to sleep early,not having good hygiene,etc....
Please help and thanks for reading :))