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Need Help For My Younger Brother in the NW Chicago Suburbs



New member
Dec 29, 2014
This is my first time posting to any forum, so bare with me please.

I come from a family of first generation immigrants, we are close and dysfunctional in our own way that is also humorous. There has been a pink elephant in the room for some time now, that is anything but humorous.

Our youngest brother is suffering from something, and I am unsure to approach it but it has finally triggered to my mother that he does need professional, mental help.

My younger brother has always been a bit off. He is 28 years old now and doesn't have any friends, does not have a job, and rarely leaves the house much less his room. He has little to no empathy for his family, whom are the only people he has contact with and he has gross delusions of grandeur that none of us quite understand. Things started to go down in his mid teens and I have begged family members to take him to seek medical help, but with little approval or even suggesting he has a problem. About 4-5 years ago my brother went to Europe on a solo trip, when I attempted to speak with him on how his travels were going via instant messenger/FB chat he was convinced that there were KGB members or Govt officials after him and that there always have been. He went on a very extensive rant on how there have always been people following him, his entire life. On how the CIA wanted him to join them, but didn't ask out front, but would follow him on his morning runs. He told me not to say anything to our parents, I clearly did not keep my promise to keep it a secret and told our mother. When he found out she brushed it aside and he was upset so he said he would never tell me anything in respects to the CIA, KGB people ever again. He is extremely irritable, he doesn't have any real goals in any honest sense of the word. I have read a bit about schizophrenia, but I am by no means a professional but many of the online stores of people sharing their first hand experiences seem a bit more drastic. I have always thought he fell on the Aspergers spectrum, he is very awkward, rarely makes eye contact with people and doesn't speak strangers or likes places with a lot of people. He at times will zone out and when I look at him it seems like he has an inside joke with himself and he is giggling to himself. He is 28, I do not know how my mother and I will get him to see a specialist since he is technically an adult even though he lives at home. Please, any advice would help.


Worried Older Sister


Well-known member
Dec 4, 2013
Hi, ambercastle.

May I just ask, are you also living in NW?

It's understandable that you'd be worried about your brother's behaviour, because (although obviously I'm not a professional) his behaviour does seem to suggest a mental health issue. Please remember that when you've got something like this on your mind, although you're naturally going to focus on the wellbeing of your brother, you must also focus on your wellbeing.

You have to remember also that you can only help people who want to be helped. If he's irritable and secretive, it's going to be very hard to turn him around.

However, you're doing the right thing by keeping an eye on him, for his own benefit, and by sharing any pertinent information you have with loved ones. I'm sorry your mother shrugged it off. My advice there would be to speak to her again and explain your concerns as you have done here.

I know it sounds like a drastic measure, but... have you thought about staging an intervention? That might be something to consider if you find you can't communicate with him meaningfully about this otherwise. I'd look into how to do this before attempting anything, though - even better if you have a mental health professional involved in the planning process. It might also benefit your brother if you gain the backing from your friends and family regarding your concerns beforehand, so they can raise their concerns too.

Please remember that your brother will be fine. He's got you, and you're concerned about his wellbeing and will go out of your way to help him. That's really great. Also, there are lots of people like him in the world who are doing just fine. Hopefully you'll get through to him soon so he can begin to tackle his apparent health issues.

Hope everything goes really well for you.
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