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Need counselling like now

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Leedslondon

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Apr 17, 2020
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Leeds
Does anyone else ever feel like they need to start counselling today, not next week, month, or year but today, really want help to start getting better now?
 
bpd2020

bpd2020

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May 25, 2020
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I understand the feeling. We want to feel better right away and it is hard being on a waiting list.
 
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LokiPokey75

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Apr 1, 2020
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Yeah, Leedslondon.

I can understand what you're going through. That's why it's so great to have a forum like this where we can talk about what we're feeling. Even though I get therapy, this is my way of getting those emotions and fears out the moment I'm feeling them. It helps to soothe my negativity so that I can proceed forward knowing I've got support.

So whatever you're feeling Leeds, let us hear it! We'll do the best we can to make you feel heard.
 
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irwin

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Oct 14, 2020
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51
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Colorado, USA
It's a shame there's not a number you can call just to talk to someone... like a suicide hotline, but for people who just need to talk to someone. I mean, if you want advice, you can get that from books or from forums like MHF, but if you just want someone to talk to and you're alone, there's nothing out there other than therapists who charge sometimes upwards of $100 an hour.
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

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Jun 13, 2016
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In my opinion there is a lot to be said for support, understanding, empathy and suggestions while that person always exercises their own judgements/decisions while waiting for the help from Professionals. Isn't this the sort of thing this Forum does day to day :)
 
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Leedslondon

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Apr 17, 2020
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Leeds
Just feeling generally fed up with everything atm, plus have issues from past abuse that I need to work on asap as they’re effecting me day to day plus effecting my relationship too, and if I don’t get help quickly things are just gonna get worse
 
Bizzarebitrary

Bizzarebitrary

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Dec 17, 2018
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Hi! You sound motivated by frustration. That can really help cut through the usual hang ups and stalling that delay the start of counselling.

There are brief therapies, 6-12 sessions that are designed to address a behavior you'd like to change or a problem that's come up. There are longer ones for dealing with problems in the past or persistent mental health conditions.

If you were to start next week, what type of counselling program do you think would best suit you?
 
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Leedslondon

Member
Joined
Apr 17, 2020
Messages
13
Location
Leeds
Hi! You sound motivated by frustration. That can really help cut through the usual hang ups and stalling that delay the start of counselling.

There are brief therapies, 6-12 sessions that are designed to address a behavior you'd like to change or a problem that's come up. There are longer ones for dealing with problems in the past or persistent mental health conditions.

If you were to start next week, what type of counselling program do you think would best suit you?
Hey thanks for replying, definitely longer term as I’ve had a few short term counselling courses that just don’t last long enough to address the deep rooted issues.

only problem is getting long term counselling on the NHS, they don’t seem to offer it, just short term courses then off you go you’re all better lol
 
Bizzarebitrary

Bizzarebitrary

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only problem is getting long term counselling on the NHS, they don’t seem to offer it, just short term courses then off you go you’re all better lol
That's a shame and same here in the States with insurance. It will cover 6 sessions and after that, tie 👔 a bow on you 👏 well done! Or, you get to see your therapist for as long as you like but no more than once every 5-6 weeks.

So, it's self-directed therapies and bibliotherapy for me, plus peer support groups for my depression and anxiety disorders. I can't afford to see a counsellor each week to help me work on my deeper issues.
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

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I've often thought it must be difficult confiding in a stranger, and if someone isn't relaxed while dealing with difficult past events, are they truly getting the full benefit of Therapy sessions...
 
Bizzarebitrary

Bizzarebitrary

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I've often thought it must be difficult confiding in a stranger, and if someone isn't relaxed while dealing with difficult past events, are they truly getting the full benefit of Therapy sessions...
I think it is difficult confiding in anyone the thoughts, beliefs and behaviors we're ashamed or scared to admit. A comforting aspect about a stranger is it's not someone you must look in the face the day after you confided something painful, private or embarrassing. And a professional is legally required to keep it private and ethically bound not to pass personal judgment on their patient.

The responsibility of building a trusting relationship falls to the counsellor but requires cooperation by the patient--a therapeutic alliance. As you implied It takes time to establish that rapport and given just 6-10 sessions, I feel there's some pressure to get on with the clinical work.

Most types of psychotherapy have an abbreviated version, reducing the number of sessions before termination. It requires the patient do more homework between sessions. How do you feel about that?
 
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Leedslondon

Member
Joined
Apr 17, 2020
Messages
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Leeds
I think it is difficult confiding in anyone the thoughts, beliefs and behaviors we're ashamed or scared to admit. A comforting aspect about a stranger is it's not someone you must look in the face the day after you confided something painful, private or embarrassing. And a professional is legally required to keep it private and ethically bound not to pass personal judgment on their patient.

The responsibility of building a trusting relationship falls to the counsellor but requires cooperation by the patient--a therapeutic alliance. As you implied It takes time to establish that rapport and given just 6-10 sessions, I feel there's some pressure to get on with the clinical work.

Most types of psychotherapy have an abbreviated version, reducing the number of sessions before termination. It requires the patient do more homework between sessions. How do you feel about that?
If I’m honest I struggle with doing any homework and making actual changes, I can happily sit and waffle on about all my problems, childhood and abusive relationship, session after session, which does feel good tbh just talking about it but then I don’t really do anything differently and I end up depressed again and wanting more therapy ...
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

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I think I get the rough idea how homework works, but no two people are the same... some might be able to achieve great results, while others not so much...
 
Bizzarebitrary

Bizzarebitrary

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If I’m honest I struggle with doing any homework and making actual changes, I can happily sit and waffle on about all my problems, childhood and abusive relationship, session after session, which does feel good tbh just talking about it but then I don’t really do anything differently and I end up depressed again and wanting more therapy ...
Me too. I really struggled with completing homework before I got a bit of symptom relief from medicine. I found it awfully hard to concentrate enough to absorb concepts and as soon as I got home, all I wanted to do was numb-out.

Real change began for me when therapy became collaborative, rather than therapist-as-teacher. Or, if I'm being honest, therapy was me running my mouth until the last 5 minutes, when I would disclose something really big on my way out the door.

@OCDguy homework was a way for me to engage more in my treatment. The collaboration began something like this:

Therapist: why don't you choose where to start and I'll guide you.
Me: uhhh... I have no idea.
Therapist: Ok. Pick one thing you'd like to work on changing: your thoughts, beliefs or behaviors.
Me: um. I sort of need to change all of them?
Therapist: Then you'll be pleased to know that changing one will affect the other two, so it doesn't matter where we begin.
(I chose thoughts)

@Leedslondon childhood trauma? That's awfully tough to process, wishing for you that the healing comes soon. I imagine there are some ways in which you learned to survive. Are they now getting in the way of you thriving?
 
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