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spookyszn2000

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my boyfriend has bipolar disorder and when he’s in an episode he completely shuts down and cuts off all communication with me. he says he just doesn’t know how to talk about his emotions and doesn’t want to be a burden. i’ve repeatedly told him he would never be a burden to me, but he still doesn’t believe me. he’s in an episode right now and completely moved all of his stuff out of our apartment and took his dog and left me. he blocked my number, blocked me on snapchat and facebook and won’t talk to me. i’m so close to giving up on him but i want to help him but i don’t know what to do. does anyone have any advice?
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Hi,
Can you contact any of his family so they can get help for him?
Do look after yourself as well your mental health is as important.
I'm sorry this has happened, hopefully when he's feeling more stable he will talk to you.
Hugs
 
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spookyszn2000

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Hi,
Can you contact any of his family so they can get help for him?
Do look after yourself as well your mental health is as important.
I'm sorry this has happened, hopefully when he's feeling more stable he will talk to you.
Hugs
I’ve been in contact with the friends that he’s actually talking to, but they don’t really understand what’s going on with him either or how to help. And he isn’t talking to his parents or other family members either. This only happened a few days ago so i’ve been doing what i can to take care of myself, but it’s still a very fresh wound. i’m in a much better headspace now than i was when this began. i’m hoping the same. thank you :)
 
Mayflower7

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If your concerned or his friends become concerned you can report to emergency services and they would do a welfare check.
Hugs
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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Hi Spooky welcome to the forums. What a patient and understanding person you are to want to help your boyfriend through this psychiatric crisis. Being Bipolar myself I know that during manias ideas can become very fixed and it can be difficult to change them. I have pushed away friends and family when in past manias only to return once the mania had subsided. It’s possible that he might do the same. I would accept that he has left but hold out hope that it might not be completely over and that things might change once the mania has run it’s course. I do think keeping in touch with his family would be helpful because you all comprise his support team whether he needs it or not. How do his friends say he is doing? I know it’s hard now but things will hopefully improve for you. xo, j
 
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spookyszn2000

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Hi Spooky welcome to the forums. What a patient and understanding person you are to want to help your boyfriend through this psychiatric crisis. Being Bipolar myself I know that during manias ideas can become very fixed and it can be difficult to change them. I have pushed away friends and family when in past manias only to return once the mania had subsided. It’s possible that he might do the same. I would accept that he has left but hold out hope that it might not be completely over and that things might change once the mania has run it’s course. I do think keeping in touch with his family would be helpful because you all comprise his support team whether he needs it or not. How do his friends say he is doing? I know it’s hard now but things will hopefully improve for you. xo, j
thank you! i’ve been in close contact with his best friend and she said he called her and that he was okay but he didn’t want to talk about what was going on. i’m doing my best to stay patient. i’m staying with a friend right now because it’s heartbreaking to see that all of his things are moved out of our apartment but i’m working on going back there soon. this is the second time he’s had an episode but not as drastic as this. the first time he just didn’t talk to me for 3 days and everything went back to normal. i don’t know whether i should push a little harder to contact him or whether i should just give him space.
 
JessisMe

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thank you! i’ve been in close contact with his best friend and she said he called her and that he was okay but he didn’t want to talk about what was going on. i’m doing my best to stay patient. i’m staying with a friend right now because it’s heartbreaking to see that all of his things are moved out of our apartment but i’m working on going back there soon. this is the second time he’s had an episode but not as drastic as this. the first time he just didn’t talk to me for 3 days and everything went back to normal. i don’t know whether i should push a little harder to contact him or whether i should just give him space.
I would definitely give him space. Contact might trigger him and inadvertently push him away.
Let him spiral out with the mania. People can become very irritable and aggressive when in mania and do and say things that later looking back they might not mean. It’s possible that contact would make things worse. Just be patient and continue to check in with his friend to know how he is doing. Maybe reach out to him in about a week if you don’t hear from him. Keep it brief and let him know you miss him and that you would like to remain in touch. There is every possibility that things can improve if given the time. Your patience for the process now is your best bet. xo, j
 
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spookyszn2000

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I would definitely give him space. Contact might trigger him and inadvertently push him away.
Let him spiral out with the mania. People can become very irritable and aggressive when in mania and do and say things that later looking back they might not mean. It’s possible that contact would make things worse. Just be patient and continue to check in with his friend to know how he is doing. Maybe reach out to him in about a week if you don’t hear from him. Keep it brief and let him know you miss him and that you would like to remain in touch. There is every possibility that things can improve if given the time. Your patience for the process now is your best bet. xo, j
thank you so much. my plan was to give it 1-2 weeks without trying to contact him.
 
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