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need advice about paranoia

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fair&square75

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 11, 2014
Messages
166
Location
England
Hi all...Just looking for a bit of advice,I've had anxiety & recurring depression pretty much forever,it can go from mild to severe...my problem is for the last two yrs or so (after a few bad incidents) I've been paranoid,it can be manageable most days but sometimes it eats me up esp.around menstrual cycle. I've literally cut myself off from the world,I do still go out but only occasionally. I came off FB because I always assume people are taking the mickey or slagging anything negative about me off. It's getting to the point where if I do go out,even visiting relatives,the whole stress of it all will put me off to do it again.I don't want to stay in the house all the time,it half kills me (I don't work or study)....Basically I wanna beat this because its effecting my life more and more,but my question is,what will happen if I tell my GP? I have never admitted to my GP about the paranoia and find it hard to do so,will I be persecuted in anyway? (ie will they not give me future medication because of it,could it go against me in anyway?) I'm so frustrated because its stopping me from doing things,even friends invite me to them and I desperately want to go but don't because I get so anxious
..
Any help appreciated,ty :)
 
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fair&square75

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 11, 2014
Messages
166
Location
England
PS I'm even paranoid about writing this! Was meant to say,I've been paranoid for a long time,but its only become a problem the past two yrs
 
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Polar Bear

Guest
If it's affecting your life this much then seeing your gp might be a good idea. Work and socialising often offers a distraction to these thoughts. Planting you in the world with people who are not paranoid. That might help too. I find work to be a tremendous help and distraction even though it's hard on bad days. See your gp first.

Kelly x
 
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fair&square75

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 11, 2014
Messages
166
Location
England
Ty polar bear �� I know work would do me the world of good but I'm so scared of even going to my local town centre,I've kinda let it get out of hand hopin it would go away one day but not so....i will see my GP though cos its getting out of hand x
 
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Holly Golightly :)

Active member
Joined
Dec 10, 2014
Messages
27
Location
Ireland
I originally came to this forum because I am feeling exactly the same as you Fair&Square. Even at work, I feel no one wants to involve me in conversations, etc & once I get that into my head, it's very hard to think otherwise. Likewise with friends, I already feel myself taking a step back & a particular friend asked me not to do that if I'm feeling the way I am. She wants me to talk & I know she's right, however I find some situations so difficult & feel if I just withdraw, the paranoia will lift. I too remove myself from FB a lot because I can't bear feeling like crap & convincing myself everyone else has such a better life than me (most of the time I know this not to be true). That time of the month is the worst for me too & it's only afterwards, I realise that has a lot to do with it but it still doesn't help. I'm scared I will lose people because I get so paranoid I'm not interesting...It's a struggle. Let me know how you get on because I know what you're going through right now :(
 
RainbowHeartz

RainbowHeartz

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Joined
Jun 25, 2013
Messages
13,273
i have paranoia too... i think it would help by going to see your gp

sending hugs xxxx
 
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fair&square75

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 11, 2014
Messages
166
Location
England
Ty for your reply Judazz,may I ask have you ever been treat differently about it by doctors? I've found as I've got older I can talk easily about depression and anxiety but not so much about paranoia,I don't know why,maybe through being judged in the past x
 
RainbowHeartz

RainbowHeartz

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Jun 25, 2013
Messages
13,273
Ty for your reply Judazz,may I ask have you ever been treat differently about it by doctors? I've found as I've got older I can talk easily about depression and anxiety but not so much about paranoia,I don't know why,maybe through being judged in the past x
i am always afraid of being judged, even though my cpn and my new psych have been lovely to me. i find it hard to talk about paranoia in fear that people think "im weird" or "odd" but it seems by talking to my psych and cpn they dont see it the same way as me they see many people with simular experiences... hope this helps x
 
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Dottyone

Guest
Thank god I am not alone, I hate talking to Pdocs and Cpns about Paranoia also Voices.

being judged or dismissed hurts.
 
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fair&square75

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 11, 2014
Messages
166
Location
England
Thankyou for your reply holly g :) its good to know I'm not the only one,but sometimes it feels like it is for us all. What you just said is like you are writing for me! I just feel unworthy of help because I abused drink for around 3 yrs after my dad died,it just became a habit and helped the pain and my always present lack of confidence.Before i knew it i ended up with a habit that was the hardest thing av ever had to conquer,noq i drink once a wk and only ever have low lager.When I got with my partner 3 yrs ago I was still in the midst of binge drinking but it was maskin alot of things already present,I was outgoing and still going out the house regular,now I find I cant sometimes and I try my best to explain its not lazyness but either hormones/anxiety/depression...when one settle down the other gets going and I bloody hate it....sorry you are going though this too holly,I hope it improves for you asap...im goin to rings docs tomorrow and get someone to take me...have u ever felt like when ur in a busy place that ur naked and people can see right you? Like they can read how ur feeling when we put a mask on pretending to be ok.
.thats the best way I can describe it...i will let u know how I get on and ty so much again,you all holly,judazz,polar bear & teddy, u have give me a boost to just tell the GP....lots of love to u all,I truly appreciate it :) x
 
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fair&square75

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 11, 2014
Messages
166
Location
England
Exactly teddy, people tell me to say how I feel,talk it out etc but don't realise the slightest bit of judgement is so so bloody hurtful and can knock people back loads...when I do talk about certain things people either get me or look like Av just landed on earth! Couldn't take anymore judging,it has had a huge impact on my life yet also taught me so many qualities that these 'judgees' will never have...a bit bitchy but that's how it feels to me lol x
 
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Dottyone

Guest
Exactly teddy, people tell me to say how I feel,talk it out etc but don't realise the slightest bit of judgement is so so bloody hurtful and can knock people back loads...when I do talk about certain things people either get me or look like Av just landed on earth! Couldn't take anymore judging,it has had a huge impact on my life yet also taught me so many qualities that these 'judgees' will never have...a bit bitchy but that's how it feels to me lol x
Hugz fair&square, I so know how you feel its good that youve learnt some qualities from being judged and the feeling of been looked at like an Alien when we try and explain our struggles :hug:

I can totally understand why you drank to cope with things, totally understand! Xx
We have to do what we have to do to get through, and medication is the same as Alcahol its just in a different form they are both drugs in my eyes, drs judge us for drinking while they are pushing even worse drugs. :scratcheshead:

Ive cut down drastically on drink too well done you x:hug:

you know before when you said you have felt naked while being judged, that quite s coincidence because thats how I described how I feel with eye contact with other people, almost as if my protective personal barrier has been broken.

I have not mixed outside for quite a few years due to my paranioa a fear of my thoughts being read, but explaing this to others is very hard indeed.

you keep soldiering on fair&square you seem lovely jubbly :hug5:
 
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fair&square75

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 11, 2014
Messages
166
Location
England
Ty Teddy :) and also well done to you,I had shitty people around me at the time as well and had to get away from them...its like I'm on a new road but I feel all this stuff in me n it takes over...i totally get you about thoughts being read,maybe cos in a way we are vulnerable as can be in this way...and about the barrier,yea indeed....when I do go out its like I'm on hyper alert and anyone could be the enemy lol I'm terrible for lol'ing ...but that's a habit after I've described things :) ty Teddy,it is nice knowing you x
 
ScaredCat

ScaredCat

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Joined
Dec 21, 2012
Messages
8,447
Location
Another planet
Is weird, cos I feel like this but I never really thought of myself as paranoid, well sometimes I do , but mainly think of it as anxiety and low self esteem. I know today it was paranoia I guess cos saw my mum and she said well we saw you sat, skyped mon, and now we see you again and she smiled at me ,but my head said she's being sarcastic, as in i been there too many times even though part of me know i being stupid for thinking that, or am i, idk. I feel judged all the time. Feel like everyone hates me, thinks I stupid. Doubt myself all the time. Feel like mind goes warped

I really think GP will be fine about it if you tell him
 
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Holly Golightly :)

Active member
Joined
Dec 10, 2014
Messages
27
Location
Ireland
Thankyou for your reply holly g :) its good to know I'm not the only one,but sometimes it feels like it is for us all. What you just said is like you are writing for me! I just feel unworthy of help because I abused drink for around 3 yrs after my dad died,it just became a habit and helped the pain and my always present lack of confidence.Before i knew it i ended up with a habit that was the hardest thing av ever had to conquer,noq i drink once a wk and only ever have low lager.When I got with my partner 3 yrs ago I was still in the midst of binge drinking but it was maskin alot of things already present,I was outgoing and still going out the house regular,now I find I cant sometimes and I try my best to explain its not lazyness but either hormones/anxiety/depression...when one settle down the other gets going and I bloody hate it....sorry you are going though this too holly,I hope it improves for you asap...im goin to rings docs tomorrow and get someone to take me...have u ever felt like when ur in a busy place that ur naked and people can see right you? Like they can read how ur feeling when we put a mask on pretending to be ok.
.thats the best way I can describe it...i will let u know how I get on and ty so much again,you all holly,judazz,polar bear & teddy, u have give me a boost to just tell the GP....lots of love to u all,I truly appreciate it :) x
Hi Fair&Square, no problem at all! I hope we managed to lift some of the burden for you. It is an awful feeling & you can feel like the only person in the world feeling this way & it's hard to imagine many others are out there feeling the same way. That's what can be so frightening about the whole thing. You feel so alone :( It sounds to me like you're a strong character. You managed to conquer the binge drinking so you should give yourself a lot of credit for that. It displays so much strength & determination. See that as a massive positive & if ever you feel weak, look at how far you've come. Also, don't be hard on yourself or feeling guilty about it. Everybody copes in different ways & the important thing is, you came out the other side.

I understand what you mean about the outgoing side of you. I am truly the same & love socialising & being around people but I go through terrible times where I don't want to be near anyone or leave the house. I just want to be alone but I don't at the same time (if that makes any sense?). I too always find once I start to feel a little better with sadness (say for instance) all of a sudden the anxiety may trigger. Basically I never feel 100%. I hate it too & always have this heavy feeling that I cannot shift.

Last week, I felt so alone that I could hear the world around me but felt so outside of it. I hope you're doing ok & it goes well with the doctor today x
 
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