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My self harm is getting out of hand.

O

OntheBorderline

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My self harm is getting bad. I hope it's ok to post this, but when I am upset about something I harm myself, and last night I took a flashlight upside my head. I didn't do serious damage thankfully, but of course I am sore this morning. I still have the pent up rage in me though.
 
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Wishbone

Wishbone

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A couple of questions if I may:
1.) When you do this to yourself what are you hoping to achieve?
2.) Do you want people to know you do this or not?
 
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OntheBorderline

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I don't usually let everyone know. And I do it as a form of self punishment, or to release negative emotions that I can otherwise express
 
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2Much2Feel

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I don't usually let everyone know. And I do it as a form of self punishment, or to release negative emotions that I can otherwise express
Yeah, same. It helps in the moment, but afterwards it not only leaves pain and scars (sometimes), but it's the emotional part that you are left with that is the worst, you tell yourself "this is how I handle things when they get that bad". But it doesn't need to be that way. I thought it was "here I go again, the usual" each time, like it was just a natural thing for me to do to solve the pain. But it doesn't have to be.

Do you think if you confided in someone you trust who would hold you accountable in a way that wasn't just "attention" (DBT preaches against that and I think they have it right in a way), but someone that you know you will cause you enough discomfort about it that it can help you stop before you do it? I finally told my son that my scars were from SH, and consequently I haven't done it since, as I know he'll know what it is and the pain that would cause me for him to know. Just a thought. And I'm sure I've asked you this so I'm sorry (memory isn't the best...) but have you tried any DBT skills that are meant to stop you from going down that path when your emotions get that intense? They can really work.
 
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OntheBorderline

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I have tried them in the past, but it has been a long time since I've done dbt, I can't really remember it, but I do believe in it. And I'm interested.
 
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2Much2Feel

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I have tried them in the past, but it has been a long time since I've done dbt, I can't really remember it, but I do believe in it. And I'm interested.
Awesome. That's half the battle right there. Do you think you could order the book Linehan has (it has a workbook, the full class really) or go online/YouTube to do a refresher?
 
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OntheBorderline

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Also I told my local crisis team about my sh, And that my meds don't seem to be working. So they are working on changing my meds.
 
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OntheBorderline

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I would be willing to try the work book and go on youtube
 
Tawny

Tawny

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Head injury is a really bad coping strategy. Can you replace it? A glass of cider? Loud music?

I know someone who did that thing you did and they had a detached retina.

Is it anger?
Frustration?

Can you come online and write about your thoughts before you SH? It really helps to let it all out
You can swear as much as you f$%£*&^%$$%^& like. That is what i do :)
 
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OntheBorderline

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Yes that is good advice, I believe my sh is out of anger. I think if I can stop myself before I act on impulse, and come here and write about it maybe I could get a handle on it.
 
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2Much2Feel

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You're taking the right steps, just try to keep moving in that direction. Reward yourself for it each day w something you love, a treat, when you don't do it. You deserve it:)
 
O

OntheBorderline

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Yes that is good advice, I believe my sh is out of anger. I think if I can stop myself before I act on impulse, and come here and write about it maybe I could get a handle on it.
 
2

2Much2Feel

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Yes that is good advice, I believe my sh is out of anger. I think if I can stop myself before I act on impulse, and come here and write about it maybe I could get a handle on it.
I hear you. Totally get angry at myself or someone I care about. Even a rubber band around the wrist to snap when you feel like that can help. :)
 
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