- Dec 16, 2009
- New York
I'm suffering from depression because of my life experience that was so pathetic.. I've been through so many crises with my family, the people outside. I was always picked on at school. I got hit by my parents a lot even as an adult.. I've been back stabbed by people who I thought where my friends.. I never experience a sexual relationship because I always get rejected ever since High School.. Recently I was going out with a guy that I work with for a while thinking I was finally going to have a sexual relationship until I found out he was GAY! I was so devastated that I felt like walking into to a train station to jump off of the platform and get runned over by a subway. I'm 42 & I'm still living with my mother & sister, I'm a very lonely person, I have no friends, no social life... I've been through therapists but none of them helped me.. I've become bitter, I ignore or curse people out whenever they get on my nerves, I developed a bitter attitude, I've become very unfriendly because of this BS I've been through in my life. I wake up every morning asking myself if I deserve to be alive. My life is filled with nothing but disappointment and misfortune. I don't know how much more of this I can take.. I'd be really happy if I get caught in a fatal accident, I'll be free of my misery and pain..