My mum hates me

Majulka

Majulka

New member
Joined
Aug 3, 2017
Messages
2
#1
So I finally managed to move out. I couldn't stand it all at home anymore. My mum was blinded by her new boyfriend and it was so painful. I am 21 years old and I felt so lonely, without a family. The worst is my brother stayed there and now he is there without me. I moved far away to a different country. I thought it would be the best thing to do. But now I am here. I have 2 months to find a job otherwise I will be totally out of money. But it is still better than going back there. I am in Sweden for 1 month and the only thing she messaged me with was that she already got rid of my things. It is so painful for me because I am a family type and I need someone close to me. Friends aren't enough to me. I live with a boyfriend now but he doesn't understand my pain he thinks it will disappear but it is something that is deep inside me and it is eating my soul. When we visit his family and I see how his mum is trying so hard and cooking for us and helping us it only makes me sad because I think about my mum who doesn't care. I told my bf that I will be fine. I still secretly cry at night. I love him so much but the worst is I know he cannot help me with this. I wish it was possible but the love he gives me is different from the love I need right now. The love that I wasn't getting my whole life. The mother's love.

I am not sure if I am depressed but it is not a normal sadness. I am a very emotional person and I would know that I am just sad. I am afraid it will follow me everywhere. The lack of a person I can call mum. I have never done anything bad I have always been a good daughter. I was helping her a lot. I would do anything for her. I feel so used especially now when I see that she isn't interested in being in touch. I just want the pain to be gone. I wish I could forget her.
 
blacksmoke

blacksmoke

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 26, 2015
Messages
9,227
Location
basketville
#2
hello Majulka
gosh what is it with mothers and daughters. mothers and sons is so different they most often get the better end of the wedge. has your boyfriend's mother got a daughter? if so it would be interesting to see how she is with her own daughter.

really sorry regarding, the love that you didnt get. unfortunately i dont imagine that will change as your mother is most likely unable to change due to her own upbringing more than likely. that is really very sad for you both.

all you can do maybe is to build your own life. and let go of your yearing for your mother to be loving otherwise it will trap for you and you will end up being bitter about it and that is not good especially as you go through life in later years. your mother can only be who she can be ...just as you can only be who you are ..until and unless you consciously make changes in your expectations of your mother.

thankfully you have your boyfriend's mother who is caring i know it aint the same but hey its better than nothing and i would cherish this.
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

Well-known member
Moderator
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
9,118
Location
England
#3
Hi,
:welcome: to the forum
I'm so sorry about your mum, I'm here to listen. Your going thru tough times, visit a dr if you feel you might be depressed.
Counselling or drug treatment may be offered.
A dr can diagnose you.
Take care
 
T

Tom2202

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 1, 2017
Messages
67
#4
My dad seems to hate me at the moment, you're not alone.
I live with my parents these days because of financial reasons, and everything I do seems to annoy him.
I seem to be a constant source of irritation to him, it's so depressing.
This morning I was very close to storming out after I heard him bitching about me to my mum.
I kept my mouth shut, walked round the corner and let my emotions out there instead.
I'm in a very fragile state of mind right now and I need this like a hole in the head.
 

Similar threads