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My Housemate Needs Help.

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tigermoff

New member
Joined
Jul 24, 2008
Messages
4
Location
Bristol
And we don't know what to do. I'm really hoping someone one here can give me advice.

I moved in with my girlfriend and a couple of other guys about 8 months ago. Everything started off fine.

After a few months we noticed that one of our housemates was acting slightly strange.

  • He wasn't sleeping
  • He was talking to himself in his room at night
  • He was going out for walks at strange hours
  • He would get very excited
  • He became obsessed with the sunrise
  • Was worried he was not eating correctly

These things didn't bother us really. We did think he was talking to someone on the phone late at night, but we believe differently now as I have see him talking to himself on the landing.

He has been taking ketamine quite often and has been smoking weed (not so often). I'm not a professional but Ive seen people with drug induced psychosis and what he has is different.

He has been under lots of stress at work as his business is going down hill due to him not being able to function properly.

Everything kicked off last week when we were about to go to a festival. He had a row with his business partner and ending up crying very vocally in his room. He then seemed to be reasonably OK but was saying that things would all come together at the festival, as though he knew something was going to happen.

When we got to the festival he went off on his own and we didn't see him for a day or so.

When we did see him he had completely changed. He was going on about:

  • Channeling energy through his body
  • The rise and sun set
  • Controlling people by using his mind
  • Controlling the music by using his mind

He had also stripped himself naked and was walking around. He had also wet himself and left the festival by jumping through a barbed wire fence. He was having muscle spasms and constantly twitching. He wouldn't stay still and kept practising his martial arts where ever he went.

He hadn't really been doing any drugs as he had lost all his money on the first day.

We were hoping he would calm down, but after 3 days he was still the same so we got his mother to come and get him and he could relax with his family for a few days to get back to normal.

He has been with his family since Monday and he is still the same. Hes still going out for walks at weird times and talking nonsense as though he is living in a different world and his imagination is becoming reality. We don't believe his mother is facing up to the seriousness of the problem and his father keeps telling him to pull himself together.

He has told his family that he has an imaginary friend who is his 'wrong' side and another who is his 'right' side. He has also admitted the reason for his very early morning walks is that he MUST see the sunrise as is he doesn't see the sun come up it never will rise and we will all be in eternal darkness.

We have looked in his room and found many photos of sunrises and we and his parents have found notepads with what looks like him writing to himself telling himself what to do. Its also written in a variety of different handwriting.

We don't believe him to be a danger to himself or anyone else. He has times when he is fine but then he has times when he flips out and we are worried that one of these times he may hurt himself as he was cooking dinner the other night and was waving a knife around and dancing.

We really don't know where to go to get help. We may be able to get him to voluntarily admit himself into hospital, but if we cant what can we do to help him. He needs a professional to talk to him.

We have got a GP to see him but he said that it could be 3 weeks before they can do anything. This cant be right. He wants to come back to live with us but my girlfriend cant be in the same room as him as it upsets her so much and we have to work and cant look after him.

Sorry this post was so long but we're all worried for him and I didn't want to miss out anything that could be important.

Thank you in advance.
 
KP1

KP1

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Apr 4, 2008
Messages
1,500
It sounds to me as if you have done your bit as a friend. His family could return to the GP or try a&e in an emergency. Hope it all goes well.
KP
 
T

tigermoff

New member
Joined
Jul 24, 2008
Messages
4
Location
Bristol
Thank you. I will give this information to his family.

I was also wondering from what I've written what may be wrong with him so I can read up. I guess mental health professionals read this forum and could give some suggestions.

We just want to help him and do whats best for him.
 
S

Starbright

Guest
I don't know of any mental health professionals reading this forum but there might be. It seems to be service users rather who are on here.

What is going to take 3 weeks - do you mean he has an appointment in 3 weeks to see a psychiatric consultant?

I suggest that his family make a note of what he does and say to the consultant when they see him that they want him to be admitted to hospital. They might have to push extremely hard to get this as the mental health system relies on there being family at home to care for the person and tends just to send them home with the family and with some drugs.

I only got into hospital after a few suicide attempts and being psychotic and loose in the community. If you can get him assessed for hospital it sounds to me that he stands a good chance of getting in if he is not in touch with reality and if it is his first episode.

Please stay friends with him. Lots of us lost all our friends when we went into hospital. Just visit him when he is a bit better and stay in touch. You don't have to do loads to do this. And then once he's out and recovering, include him sometimes in what you do. You will find that his old personality will still be there. He might though feel tired and lethargic and put on some weight, as these are side effects of pretty much all the drugs. Hopefully you can cope with that.

All the best. It's a horrible thing to go through but it's just as bad for him I can assure you.
 
T

tigermoff

New member
Joined
Jul 24, 2008
Messages
4
Location
Bristol
Thank you Starbright.

The GP said it would be 3 weeks before he could get an appointment with a specialist.

The reason we don't want him coming back yet is for his own sake. Living with his parents for a while (who live in a different town) will take away the temptation for using drugs which will make him worse. At least being there he will be looked after 24 hours a day and he does not know anyone to get drugs from.

He is very lucky as he has many friends who love him and will all stand by him whatever happens. We want him to come home and live with us but we want him to see a professional and get some stability back in his life first. We have all phoned him and are keeping him in the loop with life and will visit him when the time is right.

He may have problems for the rest of his life but with the help of his family and friends we can make it easy for him to get back his old self.
 
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Dollit

Guest
I'm glad your friend has people to care for him. It may be difficult for your friends parents to admit that their son has problems - there is still a lot of stigma attached to mental health problems and some parents, mine included actually thought that they'd passed mine on to me genetically.

You've done all you can for the time being and it does sound as if he's better off with his parents.

Even if a professional person read your post they would not attempt a diagnosis - that has to be done face to face under the correct circumstances. A three week wait to see a consultant or one of their staff means that your friend isn't considered that urgent but he is getting a priority appointment.

Continue to support and care for your friend and meanwhile we can be here for you.
 
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tigermoff

New member
Joined
Jul 24, 2008
Messages
4
Location
Bristol
Yes you are right. I just wanted answers quicker than I'm likely to get them.

I totally understand and feel for his parents as they don't want to admit their son has a problem. It was slightly the same with me being diagnosed with diabetes. My mother did not want to believe I was ill and it took her a little while to come to terms with it.

I was wondering if the mental health service differs between regions as my housemate is near London at the moment and we as yourself live in Bristol. Could the problem be with waiting lists or just different areas have different procedures?
 
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Dollit

Guest
MH Services do differ from place to place. AWP who deliver in and around Bristol have actually been judged a weak deliverer but I (and others I know) have always found them to be excellent.

But in areas of dense population the waiting lists can be longer, conversely they can be really long in areas of sparse population as there can be problems in retaining staff in such places.

But rest assured three weeks is not a long wait, it just feels like one. I have emergency appointments from time to time and even then it can be a few days.

Once your friend is in the system he will have access to a crisis team which is available 24 hours a day and those systems are self-referral.
 
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