- May 14, 2019
- North Carolina
hey guys i just wanted to vent and maybe ask for some advise. so i’ve been diagnosed as clinically depressed for about a year now and i started dating my girlfriend (she’s diagnosed with bpd and for the most part takes really good care of herself and has her symptoms under control) five months ago. the relationship so far has been really great but lately something has been happening that makes me really upset and everything i try to do to fix it doesn’t seem to work. when i found out that she had bpd i read up on it as much as i could, i’ve watched countless videos about it, i ask her so many questions, i give her reassurance all the time, and i try to be as patient and understanding as possible. she doesn’t really seem to do that for me. i know she loves me but lately whenever i get sad or i feel lonely or i get quiet because i feel stuck in this sadness she accuses me of being mad at her. i tell her i’m not and that i’m sad and i usually have a reason why (her friends just got back from college and we haven’t been spending hardly any time together which i’ve tried to be understanding about or sometimes she says things that hurt my feelings because i’m sensitive). she keeps insisting that she feels like i’m mad at her whenever i get stuck in these deep overwhelming feelings of blue and it really sucks because i really just want her to comfort me and be kind and soft and affectionate to me in those moments and it doesn’t feel like she is. i don’t know why and it makes me feel like she doesn’t care which makes me even more upset and then i end up crying because i convince myself she doesn’t care. she just gets really defensive even when i try to explain things or get her to understand and i just don’t know what i should say or do to make the situation better. this isn’t a common thing but i’m stuck in a bad depressive episode right now and this has been happening lately so i just really really really need some advice and maybe even some encouragement. it isn’t something i would want to break up with her over so please don’t suggest that.