
tattoo_lou
New member
I thought that i would take a shot at writing a blog and try be as honest as possible.To see if telling my story helps me cope with the past.
So here it goes....(sorry if its long)
Since i was 15 iv been to see different councellors through my parents split.It was a nasty divorce with my parents using me as a pawn to hurt one another.Making me choose who to live with being one,hard for an 11 year old!
After many moves and lies i ended up staying with my mum, who at the time wasnt very emotionally stable. I had to save her many times from trying to kill herself,through pills or shutting herself in the garage with the engine on. I made her move so we where nearer family and give her the support she badly needed(plus the man she was with tried to strangle her,it was me who rugby tackled him to the floor to stop him),after a few years she got a bit better even though she depended on me alot emotionally. Through all that no one noticed at what i had to go through,they where more concerned about my mum,which is fair enough she was struggling but i was young and instead of going out enjoying myself i withdrew from the world and now im suffering for it now. I self harmed when i was young and stopped for years, i started again a year ago after a hard time with family which triggered off memories of what happened in my past. I went to my GP and was diagnosed with depression and when i told them i self harm they refered me onto the mental health team,which im still waiting on, its been a year now! what on earth do i have to do for them to take me serious and that i need them to help, i do play down how i feel and how much i truelly am struggling but its hard talking to people who dont listen.
Sorry if i ranted and didnt make much sense, i thought writing this and telling people would help, i feel like im going mad cos people are ignoring me or not beleiving me.
What is it i have to do for people to notice me??? Again sorry x
So here it goes....(sorry if its long)
Since i was 15 iv been to see different councellors through my parents split.It was a nasty divorce with my parents using me as a pawn to hurt one another.Making me choose who to live with being one,hard for an 11 year old!
After many moves and lies i ended up staying with my mum, who at the time wasnt very emotionally stable. I had to save her many times from trying to kill herself,through pills or shutting herself in the garage with the engine on. I made her move so we where nearer family and give her the support she badly needed(plus the man she was with tried to strangle her,it was me who rugby tackled him to the floor to stop him),after a few years she got a bit better even though she depended on me alot emotionally. Through all that no one noticed at what i had to go through,they where more concerned about my mum,which is fair enough she was struggling but i was young and instead of going out enjoying myself i withdrew from the world and now im suffering for it now. I self harmed when i was young and stopped for years, i started again a year ago after a hard time with family which triggered off memories of what happened in my past. I went to my GP and was diagnosed with depression and when i told them i self harm they refered me onto the mental health team,which im still waiting on, its been a year now! what on earth do i have to do for them to take me serious and that i need them to help, i do play down how i feel and how much i truelly am struggling but its hard talking to people who dont listen.
Sorry if i ranted and didnt make much sense, i thought writing this and telling people would help, i feel like im going mad cos people are ignoring me or not beleiving me.
What is it i have to do for people to notice me??? Again sorry x