My Emotions are Ruining everything

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Dbot13

New member
Joined
Nov 30, 2018
Messages
3
#1
Hey,

I was wondering if anyone else out there has advice on emotions.

I'm literally flying off the handle all the time. Slight criticism from my girlfriend about my appearance or my actions make me shut down or get angry.

I'm jealous of her friendship with her ex boyfriend so I get cold whenever she brings him up. I worry about them even though I have no reason to.

I don't know what to do. I'm pushing her and many others away with these reactions.

Any advice would be amazing.
 
blacksmoke

blacksmoke

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#2
Firstly hello and welcome Dbot13 emoti0ns cant live with them and cant live without them. balance is needed.

Having intense emotions is draining and sets up a cycle of anxiety and depression imo. I think it might be helpful if you start to let go of the intensity of them I say this as this is the very thing I am having to do. And its starting to help a little the bottom line is that we need to be the masters of our emoti0ns and not have them run us.

So in affect I am saying that it is a lifestyle change a radical one. but one which can only happen in increments

Have you thought about seeing a counsellor? That way you could talk through these emotions a kind of getting them out of your head and making sense. You might have some insecurity issues going on as well- we all do to some extent. The best thing is to recognise this and look at how to change.

Take the time to go for walks for at least 30 mins each day . cos emotions are all about being stuck in our heads. Being outside helps to ground us.

This takes time and is not unfortunately a quick remedy. In the meanwhile some coping mechanisms might be useful. There is loads of stuff on youtube maybe have a look and see what you can find.
 
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Dbot13

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Joined
Nov 30, 2018
Messages
3
#3
Hi black smoke,

Thanks that all really makes sense. The hard part is letting go of the intensity, it comes on suddenly and I just lose control. It's hard to stop myself from saying anything.

And I am wildly insecure. I always have been. It's a struggle to think of myself as anything more than useless. I have thought about seeing a councilor, but it's not cheap.

A walk could help when I get like that . Maybe just go clear my head...

Thank you again!
 
blacksmoke

blacksmoke

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#4
I didn’t say it was easy. Like I said it takes a while. And whilst you are doing that you are doing nothing better. a little each day is better than nothing. The thing about changing is that we have this nagging voice that says,” oh it will never work and what is the point I will never beat this.”

Well best give the two fingers to it and start to change. For me it started with what I call trigger words that I found out I used very frequently. And do you know what I am trying to remember what that was and I cant remember. So that is brilliant that has helped me to realise this by chatting to you.

Life is like an onion peel as you peel one thing away…and society lies to us that we should be not having problems that are ongoing. I started to find my own way as the so called help out there just didn’t exist least for me anyway.
 

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