My Dad

[open_ended]

My mum left my dad one week ago today and its been hell for him and a lot of stress for me and my two brothers. We are all over 18, but its still bad. He keeps saying he will kill himself if she dont come back. He said he was willing to change (get help for his anger, mood swings) but as the days go by he has now refused to get help, as he only would if she was coming back. He is adiment that he wont be able to cope and knowing him i dont think he will. She did everything from him, and after 28years of relationship, its gone.

If he keep mentioning the thought of killing himself, i would be so traumatised if he killed himself and i didnt do anything about it. Can i get him sectioned, i just dont know what to do.

 

[*Sapphire*]

Hi open ended

I am so sorry that you are in such a difficult situation, and for the impact of your parents breakup on you and your brothers.

Can you persuade your dad to see his doctor? That would be the best course of action. In the meantime, do listen to him, talking is often a good therapy for someone going through such difficulties.

When distressing and painful things happen like this it is not unheard of for people to discuss suicide as an option, but it does not necessarily mean that they will go through with it.

Mind has a good page on how to deal with someone who is feeling or talking about suicide:

http://www.mind.org.uk/Information/Booklets/How+to/How+to+help+someone+who+is+suicidal.htm#help

There are numbers of various help lines and groups on there that your dad can try.

I would suggest asking him if he has made any particular plans for suicide or if it is just a vague idea right now. If he has made particular plans then I would get in touch with his GP yourself or the NHS Direct line, and if he refuses to see them, get the GP to come to him to make an assessment of his mental health state. If he has made an attempt he needs to see a psychiatrist straight away. He can get a mental health assessment by going into A&E and asking for one explaining the situation. Again if you really fear that he will do something and he is not telling you, I suggest speaking with his GP or with the NHS Direct line, to see what they advise.

If a doctor or professional is concerned that he may be a danger to himself then yes they do have sectioning powers if that is what is needed.

What is also important is that you and your brothers look after yourselves. It sounds like a difficult time for all of you. Try to take it in turns to have a break from the home if you can, and see if other members of your family can offer some extra support to you all.

 

[open_ended]

Thank you for your reply. Some good advice there. He seems to be holding out some hope that she will come back, but i know from speaking to her its a no. If he keeps on talking about suicide, i will do what you said and contact his GP or NHS Direct. I think i will give it till next week and see if he keeps saying it.