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My best and only won't talk to me as much as they used to...

sab

sab

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I always thought I grew up out of clinginess, but seems no. My friend became distant, and it hurts. Maybe it's only in my head but I see we don't talk as much as we used to.

Actually I feel like it's me who messages the most of time, telling what I'm doing or what I'm planning or just sharing my thoughts. Maybe they're annoyed with my constant (not really constant) messages. We talked earlier and they said they not gonna leave me and we're still best and close friends but something feels different.

I'm just trying to focus on other things,but I don't really have life so I just keep checking discord to see if they replied or not. Mostly not.

I don't wanna bring it to discussion because last time I brought it with close friend I used to have long time ago, didn't end well. And I don't wanna argue with my current best friend.

I just wish I knew how to get over being clingy like that.
 
Z

Zoe1

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I would say the answer to that is to make more friends
and not put all your eggs in one basket


:hug:
 
sab

sab

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I would say the answer to that is to make more friends
and not put all your eggs in one basket


:hug:
I'd really like to, but the problem is I just can't interact with people properly. It's like I have some blockade or something. Me meeting my current best friend was pure miracle because like a year before I didn't really make any friends. Me and my current best friend have so much in common, like common hobbies and point of view, we get along pretty well (except them being distant). I created account on language social sites, few people wrote to me but I feel no motivation to respond. It's difficult to explain but it seems I only get along with certain people, with whom I have common ground from the beginning. With whom I can feel connection.

It's like at the same time I want and don't want meeting new people.
 
P

Pffft

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It's really difficult to manage how you feel when you're in this situation. I hope this doesn't come across in a harsh way but I think it maybe useful for you. I have a relative who texts me and he does the same as you. He tells me what he is upto but he never asks what I am upto or how I am. It's because of this, I find it frustrating because although he texts me, we aren't having a conversation because everything is about him. There is a lot more to it so please do not think that I think you are the same as him because I don't think you are. He is self absorbed and even if I am ill etc he won't message to ask how I am but he will message regularly with updates of what he is doing etc. Try and get a conversation that involves her. Ask how she is, ask how her day is going, if you know she has a Dr app then ask how it went. Try to find ways of focusing the conversation on her.
 
sab

sab

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 9, 2020
Messages
131
Location
somewhere
It's really difficult to manage how you feel when you're in this situation. I hope this doesn't come across in a harsh way but I think it maybe useful for you. I have a relative who texts me and he does the same as you. He tells me what he is upto but he never asks what I am upto or how I am. It's because of this, I find it frustrating because although he texts me, we aren't having a conversation because everything is about him. There is a lot more to it so please do not think that I think you are the same as him because I don't think you are. He is self absorbed and even if I am ill etc he won't message to ask how I am but he will message regularly with updates of what he is doing etc. Try and get a conversation that involves her. Ask how she is, ask how her day is going, if you know she has a Dr app then ask how it went. Try to find ways of focusing the conversation on her.
I know what you mean. It's not like I'm selfish (at least not on purpose), they know they can talk about anything with me. They know I'd support them any time and they can count on me. I'm asking them how's they day going, but I don't want to push them to answer if something's wrong.

Once they told me they don't like talking about problems, because it won't change anything, so I'm not insisting. When I told I'm telling about my day or something like that, it's not out selfishness, I just didn't know how to show that I'm thinking about them and like talking with them.

They're still distant, and to be honest. I don't know how to talk to them anymore. Guess we don't talk like we used to, not that often anymore. I just don't know what else to do. Ran out of ideas, so guess I'll let them be.
 

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