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Well-known member
Mar 7, 2009
Hi there,I posted a few times before and im just gonna have a rant.My mother is paranoid schizophrenic and im suffering with on and of depression re active I was diagnosed with.But lately my mum has been getting right on my nerves trying to deal with her is almost impossible.Ever seen the film a beautiful mind,well like that but she has more anger and mood swings.Some days I feel like balls to this and to hell with the lot of it and move out,I find it very stressful at times.She has just had a letter through from the hospital the first one in years,so she can be assessed but she keeps saying theres nothing wrong with her,iv'e tried numerous ways to help her come to some kind of understanding with her illness but to no avail.Rollercoaster ride the longest i've ever been on,its like living in a hospital on phych ward.This direction is not leading anywhere positive but shes my mother I cant just abandon her,not her fault but I do feel she controls me alot of the time and she knows it or is it just my paranoia.This is sending me into breakdown on occasions,get so frustrated and angry.................Thanks


My consultant always tells me that just because I have a mental illness doesn't mean to say that I'm not responsible for what I do or say. And yes I've used my illness as an excuse in the past but not anymore. I've learned a lot about myself this past year and I face up to my responsibilities. Perhaps your mother doesn't want to be assessed but tell her it's as much about what can help you as what can help her and you've a right to be helped. Difficult I know but you're a person too.



It sonds important that your mother does have an assessment. I would ask the Mental Health Team if she could be assessed at home. Make sure that they have privacy for this. I should also ask them for a carer's assessment as it seems to me that you are in need of a break. If you phone them tell them this. If you are not in contact with the team ask our g.P. if he will put you in contact. There nay be a notice in the surgery with their phone number on it.

Take care,:)


Oct 23, 2008
west midlands
get to know your mother

Hi for years I didnt understand her, my mum, I hated the illness, I hated her at times, but one day 40 years on she told me about her life and I GOT IT, it changed me completely towards her, rather than despising her at times, I began to admire her, understand her, know what the REAL reasons were why she behaved as she did, why she abandoned us as children etc.

Its all a bit late, I cant get the mothering back, but I settle for what I have now, Ive become her Mother in some ways.

Try and Really get to know her if you don't already, it might just help you, don't feel guilty, its not your mum whose frustrating, its what she has gone through to make her this way.

There are a lot of factors no doubt that make her behave this way, try to understand, it will help you, if you cant then don't beat yourself up, its okay to be annoyed with her, if you cant love her, then love you.

good luck

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