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Morphine, Vicodin, & Mania

Kirkpatrick

Kirkpatrick

Member
Joined
Jan 4, 2015
Messages
10
Location
Southeastern U.S.
I have a nerve tumor that requires that I take a lot of pain killers (in particular morphine and Loratab). I also have BPI and take the full complement of meds that go with that condition. Needless to say, all this can really exacerbate my mania and over all lack of judgement. I've been on the pain meds for over a year and there is no real end in sight as far as when I might get off of them.

Does anyone have any insight into this situation, or advice on how to cope with what is a permanent state of being wasted? My judgment is shot, I'm usually too wasted to drive, and I stay in a near permanent state of a cloudy stupor.
 
M

Mastiff mom

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 22, 2014
Messages
1,157
Location
Washington,DC
I can relate to you. I had to be on Percocet and dilaudid for over a year-- but this before being diagnosed nosed bipolar. I baca me very addicted to these pain meds-- I loved nodding out, feeling numb and the energy they gave me. But I had to come off them. I used Suboxyn and it was a life saver but it sounds like you can't come off these meds because of serious pain issues. Have you discussed any other options with your doctor? Hugs to you.
 
J

Jim4120

Member
Joined
Jan 4, 2015
Messages
24
Location
Texas, USA
Does anyone have any insight into this situation, or advice on how to cope with what is a permanent state of being wasted? My judgment is shot, I'm usually too wasted to drive, and I stay in a near permanent state of a cloudy stupor.
I don't know if I have any insight, but I can at least relate to you. For 3 years I was addicted to k2, and it got to the point where I was high all the time when I wasn't at work. Literally all the time. As soon as I finished smoking, I started preparing the next one to smoke, so that when I finished my cigarette I could start again. Smoke was constantly in my lungs. I began to have memory problems and hallucinations, tactile at first, then auditory and visual ones. I was angry all the time, and generally felt like I was going insane. I would be in the middle of a sentence and completely forget what I was going to say, and the entirety of the conversation I was having, even if I had been talking about something for some time. It would be completely gone, like it never happened. I would try for 5-10 minutes to try and recall it, and even with other people's help, I couldn't remember what was going on. It really started interfering in my life. I'm sorry I can't really offer much help, all I can do is sympathize with what you're going through. It makes life extremely tough being in a haze all of the time.

Have you tried other painkillers besides opiates and opioids? I know they generally don't work as well, so this may not be an effective option, especially since you mention you take both morphine and vicodin, so I imagine the pain is quite severe.
 
Kirkpatrick

Kirkpatrick

Member
Joined
Jan 4, 2015
Messages
10
Location
Southeastern U.S.
Actually, I'm on a host of other pain killers besides the opiates. I know the pills are a necessary evil, but I'm just tired of being dependent on them all the time. Even though my body has grown dependent on them, I'm not too worried about addiction, as I always have extra meds left over at the end of the month and generally, don't take more than prescribed, even though I know how difficult its going to be to eventually get off of them.

I'm just really concerned about the way they tend to really sink my judgement, especially, when I'm already in a depressed (yes, depressed on morphine) or manic state. I'm just having a hard time not making rash decisions with negative consequences.

Thanks
 
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