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missing the high

I

iamfunky

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So I relapsed in the summer and have been stable for a couple of months now, but missing that extra something the high gives you, that buzz... I have just started drinking again and find that helps and does make me wanna do mad things again... Just miss the manic me sometimes.
 
formerlymadjon

formerlymadjon

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i can relate to that i sometimes miss the manic moments, and i have also recently been drinking again, it landed me in court last week for drink drivin, necked 2 bottlesw of wine and decided itd be a great idea to go for a ride on my motorbike, now im banned for 2 yrs. Live and learn i suppose, but it was a bad time recently so mad shit has happened and it was either drink or something more of the illegal kind if you get my meaning.
 
I

iamfunky

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Drinking was the better of two evils, but you paid the price for it, sounds like you must of had a rough time lately to drive you to that. The highs are addictive, you cant beat the feeling - but I know its not real, its just my messed up brain and thus is reality now and its not that bad you know, I just cant help missing it.
 
formerlymadjon

formerlymadjon

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yea pretty bad, took an overdose of benzos woke up 2 days later in hospital and couldnt remember a right lot, brain hasnt worked right since, im getting used to how it works now but i dont think itl ever go bak to how it was.
 
I

iamfunky

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There's more than one danger (the obvious end result) to an overdose. Luckily ive not been affected by my attempts... Im sure the new you is as lovely as the old you. Xx
 
Reach

Reach

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I know how you feel, i miss the manic highs too, but i cannot stop my meds and go through all that shit again. I'm fresh out of an episode and not wanting to go back down that road. Try to find something to appreciate about being in normal mood and that might help. A life unwell is no llife.
 
formerlymadjon

formerlymadjon

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thank you its taking some getting used to but il get there
 
HairyCamera

HairyCamera

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I can empathise

I understand how you feel because sometimes I really miss the highs. I feel like medication just prevents it but sometimes can push you down too much so that you miss the high feeling. I refuse to come off medication though because the full blown mania is worse than anything.
 
I

iamfunky

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I dont really get depressed on the meds just numb and normal... You cant beat that high man... Until it gets manic granted... I do miss it.
 
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