Missing my old FP so much right now

Screechout

Screechout

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Jan 4, 2019
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67
#1
Tonight and like every night for past week i've not been able to sleep for many different reasons and tonight is because my old FP. I no longer see her and it's been over a month, in my head I count the days every day when I last saw her and spoke to her and it really hurts and miss her so much. I also feel so ashamed of these feelings and how intensely I felt about her, I don't even think she was just a FP to me I fell for her pretty hard and developed feelings for her. I just haven't met someone in a while who made me feel the way she did or how perfect she was to me, she had the same interest as me etc etc.

I'm just really struggling to still come to terms with it, don't get me wrong I'm dealing with this a lot better then I would of in the past but it still hurts. I don't even feel like I can talk about it in my group psychotherapy because this person actually works within the mental health team so I don't know where to voice how I feel. At the moment I just feel so ashamed about my feelings for her because I know it was 100% unrequited because we worked together in a professional capacity and she was 100% professional with everything. In some weird way I feel like I'm trying to get over someone I never had and it sucks hard, really hard.

Sorry for the long post, just need to voice my opinions right now.
 
Flameheart (was BPDevil)

Flameheart (was BPDevil)

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#2
you just have to keep pushing through, remember the reasons why you ended it, things will get better and easier soon

I know I'm not strong enough to do what you have so far, I tell my fp I can't do this anymore and after 1 or 2 weeks go running back to him, you don't want to be like me
 
G

Girl interupted

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861
#3
It will only get better with time. And it sucks that that is the only solution.

Come here and post. Lean on us.

You are stronger than you think.
 
Lunus

Lunus

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#4
you just have to keep pushing through, remember the reasons why you ended it, things will get better and easier soon

I know I'm not strong enough to do what you have so far, I tell my fp I can't do this anymore and after 1 or 2 weeks go running back to him, you don't want to be like me
I’ve never had a FP and judging my how erratic my emotions are it’s probably just as well as all roads with one just seem to lead to more suffering.
 
Screechout

Screechout

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Jan 4, 2019
Messages
67
#5
you just have to keep pushing through, remember the reasons why you ended it, things will get better and easier soon

I know I'm not strong enough to do what you have so far, I tell my fp I can't do this anymore and after 1 or 2 weeks go running back to him, you don't want to be like me
If I had the opportunity I would probably go straight back as well though if I'm honest, stay strong

It will only get better with time. And it sucks that that is the only solution.

Come here and post. Lean on us.

You are stronger than you think.
I'm trying to be strong it's just hard, I have a lot of different things going on at the moment. I feel like I keep going back and forth from being okay about the situation and seeing the positives then swinging straight back to be depressed and devastated about it.
 
Screechout

Screechout

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Joined
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Messages
67
#6
I’ve never had a FP and judging my how erratic my emotions are it’s probably just as well as all roads with one just seem to lead to more suffering.
I also can act quite erratic as well so I understand what you mean
 

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