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Mentalmania

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honestjohn

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Mar 11, 2008
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A 49 year old male,suddenly finds himself single again,after many years being married and bringing up a family.Question what does he do with whats left of his miserable life.He's straight not gay,not that it makes any difference.He's still interested in the opposite sex but has mental health issues.He likes adventure,travel is completely useless in more then one persons company,but would like companionship.He see's a very bleak future,how could he quickly inject some direction into his life.His child like mind is younger then his years,and only seems to want to connect with younger people of the opposite sex,is this wrong.He feels like becoming a drifter or just maybe blowing his brains out.The hostility he faces from people on a daily basis,just because of the way he looks through his condition is becoming overbearing.
How can we direct this person to a brighter future,would anyone wish to take this burdon on,what do we say to him.
 
yakuza

yakuza

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Mar 20, 2008
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Hi Honestjohn,

I would take every day as it comes and I would set myself targets,not too big or unachievable but just simple targets.
I doubt that there is a sure fire way of feeling on top of the world Honestjohn but I think we all enjoy certain things in our lives.
I would concentrate on what you enjoy,that's what I try to do,it does'nt always work but I try.

:)
 
Ashami

Ashami

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A 49 year old male,suddenly finds himself single again,after many years being married and bringing up a family.Question what does he do with whats left of his miserable life.He's straight not gay,not that it makes any difference.He's still interested in the opposite sex but has mental health issues.He likes adventure,travel is completely useless in more then one persons company,but would like companionship.He see's a very bleak future,how could he quickly inject some direction into his life.His child like mind is younger then his years,and only seems to want to connect with younger people of the opposite sex,is this wrong.He feels like becoming a drifter or just maybe blowing his brains out.The hostility he faces from people on a daily basis,just because of the way he looks through his condition is becoming overbearing.
How can we direct this person to a brighter future,would anyone wish to take this burdon on,what do we say to him.
First, someone is not defined by the relationship they have or don't have. Married, single, makes no difference.

Secondly, 49 yr old male likes adventure and wants to know which direction to go in; North, South, east or west - pack the rucksack and choose one from the four choices.

Thirdly, if 49 yr old male likes connecting with people younger of the opposite sex, and wants to know if it's wrong, then the answer is simple; if it involves anything sexual with a minor then yes, it is very wrong.

Fourthly, if the urge to become a drifter is strong then perhaps a solo trip across the states with a handycam, video diary in the making, would be a constructive and positive step? I say America, chose anywhere - go to New Zealand and work the organic farms for example. It would make a great video story which could lead to other things.....
 
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honestjohn

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Thirdly, if 49 yr old male likes connecting with people younger of the opposite sex, and wants to know if it's wrong, then the answer is simple; if it involves anything sexual with a minor then yes, it is very wrong.

..
Sorry should have said in thread,30-40 years of age to connect with,didn't expect people to suggest anything sinister.
 
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Louise 28

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Hi, glad you clarified the interest in younger people as being say- above 18, ie interest in adult relationships, I say, if you get the chance, then go for it.

If they cant see you for who you are inside, regardless of what you look like on the exterior, then, maybe they just arent for you.

I single now too, after a long relationship, and hey I can empathise, it hurts to be alone.

Hang in there though.
 
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Louise 28

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hi

Hi,
and thanks for noticing me.
Thats so nice. Feels good just to be noticed!
Thank you
 
yakuza

yakuza

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Hi,
and thanks for noticing me.
Thats so nice. Feels good just to be noticed!
Thank you
You are very :welcome:

Have a good look around the forums,there's lot's of interesting stuff :clap::)
 
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honestjohn

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Hi, glad you clarified the interest in younger people as being say- above 18, ie interest in adult relationships, I say, if you get the chance, then go for it.

If they cant see you for who you are inside, regardless of what you look like on the exterior, then, maybe they just arent for you.

I single now too, after a long relationship, and hey I can empathise, it hurts to be alone.

Hang in there though.
Welcome Louise to the forum.

My friend is the one who i have wrote about in this thread,I can't think why people have assumed its me.He has been a really good father to his children,but finds himself now seperated from his wife of many years.He has more or less word for word,told me in confidence how he feels,as above.

Someone once said to me that a warped mind is a dangerous one,he certainly would be hurt,
if people were being sick and narrow minded towards him.He expressed finding a lady 30 TO 40 years old,if he decided to try another relationship.The difficulty i face is being friends with his wife,and no i'am not having an affair with her,I'am just a little bit caught in the middle of things.

I was'nt sure if the age gap was to wide in age difference,so wanted to hear what others thought here.Nice to welcome you here LOUISE.honestjohn,honest.
 
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Louise 28

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Welcome Louise to the forum.

My friend is the one who i have wrote about in this thread,I can't think why people have assumed its me.He has been a really good father to his children,but finds himself now seperated from his wife of many years.He has more or less word for word,told me in confidence how he feels,as above.

Someone once said to me that a warped mind is a dangerous one,he certainly would be hurt,
if people were being sick and narrow minded towards him.He expressed finding a lady 30 TO 40 years old,if he decided to try another relationship.The difficulty i face is being friends with his wife,and no i'am not having an affair with her,I'am just a little bit caught in the middle of things.

I was'nt sure if the age gap was to wide in age difference,so wanted to hear what others thought here.Nice to welcome you here LOUISE.honestjohn,honest.
Hi, Just assumed it was you, because you didnt specifically say who it was. But like you say- I had no reason to assume that, just did.

You sound like you are in a sort of awkward situation being friends with the guy- and friends with the wife- if Ive understood that?
And well done on not having an affair, I dont know if you are interested in her in that way- but so many people do have affairs, and I understand how much it hurts most/ all involved.

I don't think that the kind of age gaps you talked about matter that much, well, they wouldnt matter to me personaly anyway, but I still think it's up to those directly involved.

And I can empathise with you with the caught in the middle feeling too.

Stay well.:)
 
Ashami

Ashami

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Sorry should have said in thread,30-40 years of age to connect with,didn't expect people to suggest anything sinister.
Hello Honestjohn

I'm sorry too, if my reply caused offence, it says more about me than you!
 
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honestjohn

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Mar 11, 2008
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Off To The Pub

Hi, Just assumed it was you, because you didnt specifically say who it was. But like you say- I had no reason to assume that, just did.

You sound like you are in a sort of awkward situation being friends with the guy- and friends with the wife- if Ive understood that?
And well done on not having an affair, I dont know if you are interested in her in that way- but so many people do have affairs, and I understand how much it hurts most/ all involved.

I don't think that the kind of age gaps you talked about matter that much, well, they wouldnt matter to me personaly anyway, but I still think it's up to those directly involved.

And I can empathise with you with the caught in the middle feeling too.

Stay well.:)
Thanks Louis for your reply,Iam a schizoid so try to avoid most people including my friends wife.I would not have an affair with anyones wife/girlfriend its not my style.If i was to look for a relationship it would have to be only one person not several,somebody about 30 to 40 years old.They would have to understand my condition,and be able to relate and adapt to the climate changes which happen with spd.Anyway i'am off to the pub,if you decide to reply back, will post back to you tomorrow.honestjohn,honest.
 
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honestjohn

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Now I Must Get To The Pub

Hello Honestjohn

I'm sorry too, if my reply caused offence, it says more about me than you!
No offence unless your younger then 30 years old,only joking.All ladies 30 to 40 years old apply within,still only joking,lol's,honestjohn,honest.
 
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honestjohn

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Mar 11, 2008
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Golden oldie

You discriminating against us oldies then :D
I'am a golden oldie myself,proof,youngsters allow you on to the bus ahead of them,and more besides.honestjohn,honest.
 
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