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Mental Health Awareness Week

A

AL123

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 3, 2019
Messages
48
Location
England
Hi All

With it being Mental Health Awareness Week I thought I'd share my story on here. Hopefully this can help/inspire others who are going through what I experienced and also encourage others to share stories of their own experiences if they wish to.

At first I didn't really know what was happening to me and chose to ignore the issues I was going through. I would just push them to one side and say to myself I'd be okay and the thoughts/feelings would go away. I couldn't have been more wrong. I started to lose control of my life right in front of my eyes. I'd have suicidal thoughts without thinking about the effects it would have on others and would say to myself It would be the right thing to do. I'd go out for walks on my own without caring where I was going and what could happen. The depression was crippling me and had total control on me. Throughout this time I had a death in the family which really hit me hard. I also had a close friend pass away due to suicide a few years earlier.

I felt as if there was no way out and that this was how my life would always be. I turned to self harming which at the time felt like the only thing to do. The pain was horrible, but felt it was the only thing I could do. I didn't open up to anyone about what I was going through. Sometimes I'd find myself in tears for no reason or due to the thoughts being unbearable. It was as if my feelings and thoughts were following me despite myself trying to block them out. I had started to take medication for my depression and anxiety but I felt that wasn't helping. With the encouragement of family and friends I went to see a doctor who suggested I went to see a counsellor and attend sessions with them to discuss my issues. The doctor had signed me off work for several weeks and during these weeks I still had several down moments. Deep down I didn't want to attend counselling and wrongly thought it would be no help and they would just judge me and be no help. The doctor himself was very helpful and understanding which I may not have thought much at the time, but I do now.

My thoughts hadn't changed after the first session and my feelings and thoughts continued to say to me you will never change and this will be how you are for the rest of your life. The counsellor set me a few tasks to complete and I was to attend the next session (six week course six sessions). Gradually after the end of each session my feelings and thoughts changed. They turned to my counsellor is here to help you. He is here to listen, he is here to discuss feelings and thoughts and here for you. Overall I began to felt that bit more positive after each session. The tasks he set me each week were really helpful and I completed them all. Some of them were challenging, but I began to realise why he was setting them for me and that they were of help to me. By the time the sixth and final session had come round I felt so much better. Negativity turned into positivity. Bad thoughts were dealt with thanks to the tips and work I had done with my counsellor. I returned to work after these sessions.

I now sit here as I type a completely different person. Yes I still have days where I have bad thoughts or feelings. They sometimes dominate my mind, however I feel thanks to the wonderful counsellor and the sessions I attended I can now control them. I have several books as well which I have read which are full of helpful advice and tips. All well worth a read in my opinion. With the help of my family and friends as well as the counsellor as mentioned I can now look back on that journey and as mentioned type the above.

The one thing I can say is no matter what your thoughts feelings are telling you, YOU ARE NEVER ALONE. There are always people here for you to help. Talking to family and friends is a huge help. They care for you and I'm sure would be there to help. I also have to mention this forum. There were people on here who helped me tremendously. I had several replies to my first post on here. Members just dropping a little message to say they are here for me or even messages of advice and kindness. Messages daily from members asking how I was and giving me daily advice. There are people on here who were and continue to be a huge help.

I hope there are others who read this and it can help them/comfort them or even just give them a little boost.
:)
 
Prince Charming

Prince Charming

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 29, 2019
Messages
129
Location
Milton Keynes
HI AL123 It is refreshing to get such a positive post on here.You seem to have beaten your demons Long may it continue,! I wish you the very best in your future.:dance:
 
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