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Married a Psychopath ~ It's not over yet

J

jalenga

Member
Joined
May 12, 2010
Messages
5
I married a psychopath 4 years ago. The problems started before the marriage but I was naive enough to think things would get better. From day one after the marriage, gradually became more and more abusive, controlling, threatening and violent. He is Mr. Charm in public, intelligent and decieving. He mimicks emotions and claims to be a life coach, yet he has no conscience whatsoever for those he uses for financial gain or sexual gratification or any kind of benefit to him and him alone.

I eventually escaped and and although I have lost all my money and my possessions at least I am able to try to rebuild my life. The whole bullying and mind games were incredible and I feel ill equipped to find help from anywhere with no means to pay for legal help or therapy that I feel I need. I am alone and living day to day. I have no permanent refuge or safe house, as am an expat in third world country and no means to support myself. I am now getting death threats and more and the communications don't let up. He has countless other victims, I believe he has killed before and certain he could and would kill me if he were to find me.

I can't seem to find anyone in my country or where I am now who can help. I know in my research I am just one of many, but where should I go now?
 
M

madsheep

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 11, 2009
Messages
607
Location
Bedfordshire
Hey.
erm. not really sure what to say or suggest. just wanted to let you know that I have read your post and really feel for you. I was just wondering, and you dont have to say if you dont want, but what country are you in?
Take care
Madsheep
 
M

maudikie

Guest
maudikie.

I don't know what country you are in but i should go to the consulate and ask for help and advice.
 
J

jalenga

Member
Joined
May 12, 2010
Messages
5
I don't know what country you are in but i should go to the consulate and ask for help and advice.
Consulate will not help me but advise me to return to UK and seek refuge centre or hire a lawyer @ £250 per hour. I have no income and no help. I am in Central America. Police protection is minimal. Will only act after the event. UK can't do anything as I am not in the country. What I am wondering is if I return on what little I can raise to get me back then what? Homeless or will I get some help support and protection without funds or family?
 
J

jalenga

Member
Joined
May 12, 2010
Messages
5
Hey.
erm. not really sure what to say or suggest. just wanted to let you know that I have read your post and really feel for you. I was just wondering, and you dont have to say if you dont want, but what country are you in?
Take care
Madsheep
Thanks for listening. Half scared that he may read something online and figure out my plea for help and sabotage it like everything else. I am in Central America.
 
Rosepoet

Rosepoet

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 25, 2010
Messages
532
Location
Gower
Hi i feel for you i have a adopted daughter who has serious personality disorder. She played mind games too i was scared me what she would do next. These people are dangerous whether man or woman. You are in a bad situation but you should ask refuge or womans aid for advice. You in another country but you could ask them online. They would advise you even if you live abroad. These are safe schemes which move women to other countries.
 
J

jalenga

Member
Joined
May 12, 2010
Messages
5
Thanks for your help and advise but seem to have exhausted all options. Citizens advice, Womens refuge orgs, domestic violence help lines, Consulate, UK police and even written to MP where I lived.......All same story. Either can't help me because I am not in the country or say that no police protection available as no evidence of crime committed or laws broken. All I know is the threats still keep coming and he says he will hunt me down because he considers he is the victim and he has been stolen from and I ruined his life. He has turned it all round and he is so very very convincing. Acts out emotions and gains sympathy.....He has an income, he has returned home, he is threatening to come back and I don't know how long I can cope with looking over my shoulder or keeping my sanity.
 
S

*Sapphire*

Guest
How is he managing to threaten you? Can you not stop all contact with him?

Is there a law there for harrassment? Can you get an injunction?
 
J

jalenga

Member
Joined
May 12, 2010
Messages
5
Yes I can stop and have stopped where I can but there always third parties and people claiming to be lawyers and whatever. Part of me wants to keep informed as to his whereabouts and try to second guess. There are no means of getting a restraining order unless I try to go through a very expensive lawyer and even then doubts as anything would be enforceable here. It seems there are no real answers.
 
S

*Sapphire*

Guest
What about your family? Are any of them in the UK?
Or friends?
 

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