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Looking For Advice

X

Xander_TDH

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May 6, 2020
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Kelloholm
Hi All

I currently have severe depression and mild anxiety and am taking medication to help both of these issues. All of this has been documented at my workplace and they know about all my problems.

Tonight, as I was doing my return to work interview after being off the past week due to showing covid symptoms (I didnt have it, it was my asthma playing up). My manager said that she understands that I have mental health problems but I need to start pushing it to the side when I am at my work and try to stop staring into space and have my "face tripping me" as I need to try and raise morale within my workplace. She then proceeded to say that obviously everyone is feeling down at the minute due to everything which is happening and I am not the only one feeling down and I should be setting an example due to being a Manager.

My questions is, should I feel bad about not concerning myself with other peoples feelings during this time as I feel that my own mental health should be a priority for myself. I know that other people are having a tough time as it is with everything happening.
 
calypso

calypso

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Hiya and welcome to the forum. I think if you have a severe depression then you need to look after yourself. Can you not get signed off work by the doctor? That way your colleague can't say anything more to you. She obviously has no idea what a depression is.
 
Mario82

Mario82

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I agree with Calypso. Xander. You're probably not in the best shape to work and your manager doesn't understand depression at all.
 
introverted_drummer

introverted_drummer

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Hi Xander, I agree with what the others have said. It's not your fault for having depression, it's how other people are treating you that's the problem.
Your manager obviously doesn't get it and you should absolutely not feel bad at all for prioritizing your mental health. After all, it's hard to help or care for others if our own mental health isn't in good shape. This is a really tough time for anyone with a mental illness and all of us should be doing a lot of self-care.
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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Nashua NH
It’s tough because there is so much stigma surrounding mental illness already that if you have a job that is good, like a management position, and a boss who understands and accepts that you have an illness it is such an amazing situation. I would not want to do anything to compromise that. Yes you have a responsibility to attend to your own needs but while you are at work you get paid, as manager, to tend to the needs of your staff too. To keep this situation going you do have to make your boss happy. While at work do what you can to be a positive model for your employees even if you have to take breaks. Evenings and weekends take extra special care of yourself at home. :hug:
 
W

WhatSarahSaid

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Apr 28, 2020
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New York
You shouldn't feel bad. Your boss is insensitive for saying "everyone feels down right now," clearly not understanding that you're dealing with this on top of your depression/anxiety that you had to begin with. They should have never said that to you.

That being said, you may have to let what they said go in order to keep the peace. However, if your boss begins penalizing you for not being upbeat or whatever, I would then go to your boss's boss and complain. You shouldn't be penalized for your illness.

It certainly may be worth trying to put on a fake happy face, but it's not always possible to put on a fake face. I'm very sorry you're having to deal with this :hug:
 
B

Black Despondency

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How long have you been on your medication?
 
X

Xander_TDH

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May 6, 2020
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Kelloholm
Thanks everyone for your replies , I dont feel as bad now knowing that I should be prioritising my own mental health.

I have currently been on my medication for about 8 months now.
 
B

Black Despondency

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Thanks everyone for your replies , I dont feel as bad now knowing that I should be prioritising my own mental health.

I have currently been on my medication for about 8 months now.
You might want to talk to your medical professional about increasing your dose or talk to a psychologist. If you are still struggling too much.
 
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