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Looking for advice w some issues of mine

D

duckymomo

New member
Joined
Dec 18, 2020
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2
Location
California
Hi I’m new here, and I’ve had some issues in the past but never got a clear answer. I’ve gone through multiple seizures and hospital visits, multiple anxiety attacks, years of depression, and more recently I had a bad episode. It was kind of late and I was starting to feel off. So I looked around my room and realized I was started to have that feeling at the beginning of a high where things move weird around me and it’s hard to focus on anything. So I go to my mom’s room starting to cry because I’ve never actually liked the feeling of being high because I like to have complete control over my body and mind. She tells me to lay down on her bed so I can calm down and try to sleep. A few minutes later it escalates and I start to envision my worst fear which brings me anxiety. It gets worse and eventually I start to feel myself slip away from reality and life itself. In my head I was thinking that everything that was happening at the moment was a hallucination and nothing was real and that in reality I was dying, and that moment was supposed to be my last time with my family. So I jump up and I hug my mom begging her not to let me go and to let me stay here with her, and telling her over and over that I don’t wanna leave. I end up calling everyone in the house to the room because I needed to see them and I needed to know that everything was real and that was alive. My sister’s friend rubs ice on me as a way to know that my senses work so I can realize that it was in fact real. Well I finally start to calm down a bit, but I’m still heavily shaking. But then the feeling comes back. And basically it happened in waves. So one moment nothing was real to me, but the next I was feeling better, and that happened as a cycle over and over, for about 2 hours. My mom tried to get me to sleep but I was too afraid that if I fell asleep, I wouldn’t wake up. This all started at around 12:30am and ended some time after 2am. By that time I was finally trying to sleep. It took several tries because I would wake up just after a minute or two of being out. But finally I was exhausted to the point where I was fully out and didn’t wake up til morning. However the feeling had a bit of a lingering effect so even the rest of that day felt off but since then it’s been slowly going away. My sister tried to do some research and found something called derealization. I don’t want to self diagnose but it did have a lot of symptoms that related to my incident. Anyways, I’m just trying to see if anyone else has ever experienced anything like this and if so, if they might have some advice or answers..?
 
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Am33

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Sep 28, 2020
Messages
382
Location
Fiji
What I learned is when you have conscious awareness you are in control of your state of mind .When you take in alcohol ,weed , drugs it makes you lose control of your conscious it puts it to sleep . What happens is it opens you up to the mass consciousness which is all the negative emotions of all the people on earth like what you described its different for each person . . Like when people go to concerts , sporting games , protests the energy from the crowd takes over . So what many people do is of course stop the substances and do positive affirmations out loud find on the net to send out positive energy to stop the negative energy invading your mind from the mass consciousness .I do it everyday helps me . :)
 
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Jakball

Member
Joined
Jul 21, 2017
Messages
7
What I learned is when you have conscious awareness you are in control of your state of mind .When you take in alcohol ,weed , drugs it makes you lose control of your conscious it puts it to sleep . What happens is it opens you up to the mass consciousness which is all the negative emotions of all the people on earth like what you described its different for each person . . Like when people go to concerts , sporting games , protests the energy from the crowd takes over . So what many people do is of course stop the substances and do positive affirmations out loud find on the net to send out positive energy to stop the negative energy invading your mind from the mass consciousness .I do it everyday helps me . :)
I don't think they were taking any substances. They didn't mention that.
 
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Jakball

Member
Joined
Jul 21, 2017
Messages
7
It sounds like derealization mixed with a panic attack. My son gets panic attacks that feel like impeding doom like the world is ending and we are under attack. He feels extreme anxiety to the point he cannot go to work and will literally collapse and feel so overcome by it and many times sleep makes it worse. Derealization is the sensation of not knowing if it is a dream or reality and the line separating the two becomes extremely blurred and can be terrifying. Depersonalization is feeling like you no longer have a body or never did and feeling like an inanimate object or completely detached from your physical body. All can be controlled with medication that will make you feel more solid in reality. Your experience must have been terrifying. I am so sorry that happened to you.
 
A

Am33

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Sep 28, 2020
Messages
382
Location
Fiji
Probably right I saw the word high and associate it with weed especially in ca. The rest what I said is valid to get grounded again with affirmations which changes your beliefs which can even change the electrical imbalance in brain causing the delusions.
 
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