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Lithium + alcohol + singed off sick + Mixed state HELP

loulabelle

loulabelle

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somewhere over the rainbow
hi guys

im a fucking messs.. ive been away for the weekend and spent saturday high as a kite sunday messy heap and monday both happy and sad and fueled with adrenaline form rollacoasters...

today i am shattered ive been out but just craved wanting to come back home to bed... this is were i am now...

my moods are all over the fucking shop no joke im happy happy happy with suicidal thoughts and s/h urges of im so low my head is racing and im speaking fast and getting it all muddled up - i know im in a mixed state my pdoc sed so and another pdoc sed so as well... HOW DO YOU COPE LIKE THIS !!!!!!????????????????? i need help i need ways of coping i cant take it .... i just wanna jump in from of a train or something i feel that awful i want it all over dont want to be like this anymore i dont want to be alive im faliure of a vet murse im on sick leave again im probably going to be sacked i cant do my job any more im so sure my boss is going to write telling me im being sacked who wants to emply some one who hasnt been in full time work since middle of feb and was off sick for a month between missle of jan and middle of feb and then had 3 weels of in nov as well.......AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I HATE MY SELF !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

my lithium is not working yet i am on 1000mg and my last blood test said it was at 0.5mml/L so it has dropped because before that it was at 0.67mmol/L why has my level dropped what dose is normally thearaputic ?????? i dunno weather level has dropped as ive been drinking ALOT over the least few weeks trying to deal with these swings and this mixed state numb the thoughts !!!!!!

im a mess and i feel like crap :cry2::cry2::cry2::cry2::cry2::cry2::cry2::help::help::help::help::help::help::help:
 
I

iamfunky

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Oh dear, i'm sorry you're not havign a great time of it, mixed states are pretty shit, i try and do anything that will relax me, i don't tend to socialise and keep myself to myself until i'm straight again.

Just know that these thoughts in your head are not real and you will get through this.

Can you increase the Lithium or try and Anti-physcotic with them??

xxxx
 
loulabelle

loulabelle

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im already on 700mg quetiapine along side my lithium and i have another blood test this week to test lithium again to see if it needs to go up

just soooooooo fed up
 
Yorkshirelass

Yorkshirelass

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Hey Lou,

I am coming to the conclusion that lithium is a big pile of shit. I'm mixed too. Just about holding it together, doped up with diazepam. Sure beats sitting there rocking and babbling shit with my head on fire...

The blood tests - mine were much the same as yours - I looked like I was at target level one week and then it was down. You need to make sure you're about 12 hours after you take it when you have your blood test and try to be consistent with the amount of water you're drinking. I know easier said than done but steer clear of alcohol too - it will screw with your hydration levels, which will in turn screw with your lithium levels.

0.5 is supposedly within therapeutic range for lithium, but they can go up to 0.8 safely and maybe beyond that if you're really careful about keeping yourself healthy and drinking enough etc, so they do have some scope to up it for you. I'm at just under 0.7. My pdoc said it would be about 2-3 weeks at this level then I should start to feel the effects if the mixed ep hasn't taken me on my merry way by then. Helpful, no?

Sending you many hugs :grouphug: - try to stay as calm as you can and keep distracted. This will pass. If you have any prn, make good use of it. It does help. If you don't have any, ask your pdoc, or even your GP - they might prescribe a short course for you, just to get you through the next few days or so?

Just as an aside, quetiapine did nothing for me until it got to 800mg. Then it made me crazy in other ways so I had to stop it, but you have scope to up that too if your pdoc is willing to do it x
 
loulabelle

loulabelle

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yorkshire - thank you so much for replying i was thinking i was the only one and i feel like im looseing the plot i actually feel like im going fucking crazy i have some diazepam from a few years ago i mite take that i have prn quetiapine but its shit!!!!!

my pdoc sed my level needed to be between 0.6 - 1.0 so i have no idea any more its all seems to be a lot of quessing work im not even sure they know what dose is good, my cpn sed she would have expected me to have leveled out my now but i havent....

i feeel like im hitting my head against a brick wall with everything

im gonna get fucking sacked and bipolar is well and truly going to ruien my life more then it has already

if i lived in a country where guns were readaliy availble BAM !!!! taking overdoses ive come to the conclution get u no were self harm just ends u up in a and e with every one giveing you either the (oh poor u) or the (ur wasting our time) looks ................. thats really morbid sorry its just the way my brain is thinking at the moment

i wish i was a pdoc i cud bloody well try fixing my self


:grouphug:
 
Yorkshirelass

Yorkshirelass

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i wish i was a pdoc i cud bloody well try fixing my self
Me too... except I think most of what they do with meds is guessing! They don't even really know how lithium works!

Try not to think about work. I know it's hard not to, but do your best. Do anything else but. Give yourself some time, get yourself well and then think about work after that. When you're well and strong you'll be able to deal with it all, but right now, you're not equipped for it. Worrying will make you feel worse.

I am very glad guns are not sold in supermarkets in this country!

Stay safe x
 
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