• Welcome! It’s great to see you.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

Lack of Understanding

JessisMe

JessisMe

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 27, 2020
Messages
7,651
Location
Nashua NH
Sometimes it seems that all of the support
people
in my life have a different understanding of my condition and are operating on different wavelengths will very little communication with each other. They communicate with me but they never “get” what I am trying to communicate either. So we have four different groups of people:
my case manager, my therapist, my psychiatrist and my parents swirling around me each with a different interpretation of my own reality, none of which is my accurate reality. Does anyone else
have this experience that nobody really “gets it?”
It can be crazy making! ☹
 
M

miller84

Member
Joined
Oct 5, 2020
Messages
8
Location
Ireland
Hi JessisMe
I totally get what you mean.
My counsellor doesnt seem to understand, cant see my psychiatrist for more than three months now and especially now when I need it. I feel sometimes all they want to hear is that Im not suicidal and then they veer off what Im trying to explain.
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 27, 2020
Messages
7,651
Location
Nashua NH
Hi JessisMe
I totally get what you mean.
My counsellor doesnt seem to understand, cant see my psychiatrist for more than three months now and especially now when I need it. I feel sometimes all they want to hear is that Im not suicidal and then they veer off what Im trying to explain.
I agree it seems to boil down to it. Mine try to understand a bit more in depth on top of it and I appreciate their efforts but at the end of the day the suicidal/not suicidal seems to surmount everything. And if you are not suicidal then that means that everything is okay! 🙄
 
00Bluejay7500 (was Scapes1986)

00Bluejay7500 (was Scapes1986)

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 10, 2020
Messages
5,123
Location
My house
I feel this way with a lot of people that are close to me. It’s sad but they do it cause I’m annoying lol but really it annoys me. It gets to the point it starts a yelling match. Sad to end every conversation in a yelling match. This is something I hope we can work on.
 
B

bpd2020

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
May 25, 2020
Messages
7,535
Location
England
Sometimes it seems that all of the support
people
in my life have a different understanding of my condition and are operating on different wavelengths will very little communication with each other. They communicate with me but they never “get” what I am trying to communicate either. So we have four different groups of people:
my case manager, my therapist, my psychiatrist and my parents swirling around me each with a different interpretation of my own reality, none of which is my accurate reality. Does anyone else
have this experience that nobody really “gets it?”
It can be crazy making! ☹
I feel this way too. Often I have had therapists say odd things to me which shows they do not understand. Only this morning I spoke to the doctor about my drop in mood only to be told its because of my mental health history. It is so frustrating when people do not understand. Sometimes I think people only understand if they have the same diagnosis.
 
W

wordypuzzler

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 1, 2020
Messages
190
Location
Uk
I feel this way too. Often I have had therapists say odd things to me which shows they do not understand. Only this morning I spoke to the doctor about my drop in mood only to be told its because of my mental health history. It is so frustrating when people do not understand. Sometimes I think people only understand if they have the same diagnosis.
Hi, I've had that when I had mental health "support" too, it's like a glass ceiling they create with barmy language and we never get to break through it to make any connection. With my CCO (useless girl) after I made a complaint, I felt as if they all spoke a completely different language in letters responding, and removed themselves from having any sort of compassion whatsoever. Useless! Not what a patient needs when they /we are suffering.
Their ears are broken and their hearts are stone cold.
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 27, 2020
Messages
7,651
Location
Nashua NH
I feel this way too. Often I have had therapists say odd things to me which shows they do not understand. Only this morning I spoke to the doctor about my drop in mood only to be told its because of my mental health history. It is so frustrating when people do not understand. Sometimes I think people only understand if they have the same diagnosis.
Me too.
 
00Bluejay7500 (was Scapes1986)

00Bluejay7500 (was Scapes1986)

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 10, 2020
Messages
5,123
Location
My house
Maybe a well-thought-out sentence would be the best option to overcome such a fear of talking to people when they don’t understand where you’re coming from or what you were talking about. I do fear sometimes that a yelling match would end in a violent argument but then again I think I am past that point in my life. I know that I don’t confront people in such a manner that would make me want them to get violent with me. I hope you find a solution to your communication issues. I’m gonna continue working on mine quietly.

❤
 
W

wordypuzzler

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 1, 2020
Messages
190
Location
Uk
Maybe writing things out beforehand? Or after, when you will see them again?
eg;
"I didn't feel as if you understood my pain /predicament or the gravity of my suffering .."
"the language you use confuses me. Plain english would be more helpful .."

Maybe some thing like this?

You could also try asking each (in writing) how they reach their viewpoint? Medical people /mental health people don't feel as we do because they are on the outside looking in. Language barriers, grr!
To get a response in writing would give the chance to think over a response. I'm finding that with my current struggles (in other areas of hardships)

I'm answering the OP and anyone else too who finds my suggestion helpful :)
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 13, 2016
Messages
2,194
There was a short period of time when I got the impression people were trying to rail-road me. It was like you have a Mental Illness so you can't think for yourself and we know best. Fortunately despite being out-numbered I stood my ground and was heard. In my younger years that wouldn't have been the case. The problem when people get together and start deciding things amongst themselves aswell as jumping to conclusions is your diagnosis and associated treatments become totally off the mark... Not only that but it can lead to people forming and making judgements which totally don't reflect you, or the person you are. In short it is highly dangerous, especially when toxic people are thrown into the mix...
The answer unfortunately comes down to being able to articulate ourselves, and be strong enough within ourselves to weather the storm, and when necessary don't take no for an answer. No easy feat when someone is struggling I know... What might help us being able to describe how we are feeling is to write it all down (as someone has already mentioned), and/or talk to people on here. The more we share how we are feeling, the clearer it becomes in our minds, and the more confident we become when having to describe everything to a stranger(s)... Hope this helps :)
 
Similar threads
Thread starter Title Forum Replies Date
W Lack of human interaction Mental Health Experiences 1
R Help understanding Mental Health Experiences 8

Similar threads

Top