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Lack of passion, self doubt, etc etc

O

olianator

New member
Joined
Apr 29, 2010
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Hi guys, first post, and a quick and probably amateurish question. I broke up with my first real girlfriend about a year ago. At the same time as breaking up I took mushrooms with my friends. Now prior to this I was a very outgoing passionate and likable person. I had lots of friends, did good work, and was on top of most of the things in my life. Your not supposed to take mushrooms when sad, and this just sent me into a whirlwind of trouble.

Its about a year later and I really just feel detached from everything. School, I have people here I could be friends with, but I cant really make friends like I used to. But whats really bugging me is this:

I do not think on my own, I analyze my surroundings and try to act "correctly" accordingly. I am in my second year of college in a city and things are hectic. I am not doing well in school and consider myself depressed. Im not sure what being depressed really is but whatever ive been feeling since last march is unhappyness and dislike of the world. I have a feeling of why do anything if were all going to die? Anyways, ive reached a point where Ive realized I dont show any emotion most of the time and thats why I havnt been engaged in anything. Ive lost all my passion for everything and every time i try to do something, work out, be passionate im plagued by this thought of the world that I have, where theres no point.

Now all I want to do is get back to just being myself. I have this thought that if I do then id be being gay and its crazy. Ive lost so much self-confidence I dont even know where to begin. I just want to go out there, do things my way, and be passionate about life, friends, school, work, etc.

Are there any suggestions? Also I should say that sometimes when I say to myself its time to get back on top of things, I get overly excited and I feel like my bodies weak and slowly I wear off the feeling of happiness and wanting to try and plunge right back into this introverted feelings and being COMPLETELY detached from everything. Im not even real to myself I feel like.

How can I get over this feeling of being "gay" and just be myself and do what i need to do ?

thanks and much love and respect to everyone here
 
D

DELATEXT

Guest
HI

Hi, take it you took magic mushrooms ??
not a good idea !!
These can seriously mess up your mind, suggest you avoid them at all costs ??
Do you think you maybe gay, do you have attraction to the same sex ??
Being gay is normal and you should seek advice or call the gay switch board for help ??
The depression, general health see your Doctor asap,
the sexual issue can cause real distress, you can be very confused and unsure, best to seek help from your Doctor, if you think you can trust and talk to your Doctor ??
wish I could give you more helpful guidance etc,
but I hope you should not be negative if you are gay or bisexual, it's normal !!
all the best..



:unsure::grouphug:
 
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