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Labelling other people as narcissists

D

Dazed & Confused

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Why do so many people go around labelling other people as narcissists? Where did this come from? Is it because of social media?

Also (please excuse my ignorance), is it possible to have a relationship with a narcissist who is dealing with it/having therapy?
 
D

Dazed & Confused

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It's like every second video on YouTube is about narcissists. Why is it such a thing?

I would be interested to hear what genuine narcissists think about this.
 
M

mycutepup2

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If you don't mind the roller-coasters, the condescension, the criticism and the fact that you won't ever be accepted as an equal, having a relationship with a narc is possible.
I have been married to a narc for 20 years, who I thought loves me the most until he confesses that I'm not his priority. We are about to get an amicable divorce or so I thought .....
 
W

WhySoSerious

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Why do so many people go around labelling other people as narcissists? Where did this come from? Is it because of social media?

Also (please excuse my ignorance), is it possible to have a relationship with a narcissist who is dealing with it/having therapy?
I think it is a hugely misused term that really isn't all that helpful. Narcissism is actually relatively uncommon and just because someone does unpleasant things or is self-absorbed doesn't mean they are narcissistic. We need to differentiate between narcissism and just being an ass-hole. I suspect many people who throw the term around often have a hard time looking at themselves and wondering whether they may be contributing to the problems. Especially when they have repeated histories of getting into narcissistic type relationships.

As for therapy, most narcissists (from what a psychologist once told me) don't seek therapy for narcissism because - frankly - they don't believe they have the problem. They may pitch up for depression or other stressors that are directly related to not being in the place they feel they deserve in life. Therapy inevitably falls on its ass because the narcissist can't accept that maybe the therapist knows more than him/her.

I don't know of a therapy that is successful in this group of people. I may be wrong.
 
GretaVon

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I think it is a hugely misused term that really isn't all that helpful. Narcissism is actually relatively uncommon

Like everything else it will be misused, including by narcissists.

It is VERY common.

If you know what it is and can recognize it, it is hugely helpful.
 
D

Dazed & Confused

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@WhySoSerious

Thank you for your very interesting post. I agree with what you're saying here. I'm not in a good space and I would like to reply properly when I'm better.
 
GretaVon

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As for therapy, most narcissists (from what a psychologist once told me) don't seek therapy for narcissism because - frankly - they don't believe they have the problem. They may pitch up for depression or other stressors that are directly related to not being in the place they feel they deserve in life. Therapy inevitably falls on its ass because the narcissist can't accept that maybe the therapist knows more than him/her.

I don't know of a therapy that is successful in this group of people. I may be wrong.
I think you are very nearly 100% correct here.
 
K

Keesha

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I think it is a hugely misused term that really isn't all that helpful. Narcissism is actually relatively uncommon and just because someone does unpleasant things or is self-absorbed doesn't mean they are narcissistic. We need to differentiate between narcissism and just being an ass-hole. I suspect many people who throw the term around often have a hard time looking at themselves and wondering whether they may be contributing to the problems. Especially when they have repeated histories of getting into narcissistic type relationships.

As for therapy, most narcissists (from what a psychologist once told me) don't seek therapy for narcissism because - frankly - they don't believe they have the problem. They may pitch up for depression or other stressors that are directly related to not being in the place they feel they deserve in life. Therapy inevitably falls on its ass because the narcissist can't accept that maybe the therapist knows more than him/her.

I don't know of a therapy that is successful in this group of people. I may be wrong.
I’m not a psychologist or know any more than your average person but I tend to agree with your post.

If you were to just take a sampling from this forum itself, it speaks volumes.

There are members who have been seriously abused by others who might be narcissists. Narcissists are beyond self absorbed and often never see fault in what they are doing regardless of the trail of damage they leave behind.

Relationships with narcissists can be very difficult for some so if they share their experiences they might be unintentionally hurting those who have been diagnosed which is understandable.

The other day on television I heard Dr. Phill warn viewers about people with Borderline Personality Disorder which I found upsetting ; especially from this man who claims to be the most non - judgmental person on earth.

I’m sure many on this forum get unfairly judged. Narcissists, those with bi-polar disorder or personality That’s the risk you take by staring. It’s like a double edged sword.

Dividing humanity into labels is never good. Even members with the same types of labels start comparing themselves with others. Is this how humanity is supposed to be.

I’ve spent most of my life feeling like I don’t fit in and starting to feel glad that I don’t.
 
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WhySoSerious

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The other myth is that narcissists know what they are doing. I can assure you that most of the time it is so in-built that they have absolutely no idea. The organism does what it does to survive. Their environment reinforces certain behaviours. I also find that many narcissists have been terrible damaged by abuse in childhood but nobody cares about that.
 
GretaVon

GretaVon

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The other myth is that narcissists know what they are doing. I can assure you that most of the time it is so in-built that they have absolutely no idea. The organism does what it does to survive. Their environment reinforces certain behaviours.
They usually don't know WHY they do what they do, but they know WHAT they have done. What they have is an automated system to justify their actions.

If you were correct then narcissists should be held not responsible for their actions. On the contrary, narcissist behavior is generally affected by the provisions of criminal law.
 
K

Keesha

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I’m not a psychologist or know any more than your average person but I tend to agree with your post.

If you were to just take a sampling from this forum itself, it speaks volumes.

There are members who have been seriously abused by others who might be narcissists. Narcissists are beyond self absorbed and often never see fault in what they are doing regardless of the trail of damage they leave behind.

Relationships with narcissists can be very difficult for some so if they share their experiences they might be unintentionally hurting those who have been diagnosed which is understandable.

The other day on television I heard Dr. Phill warn viewers about people with Borderline Personality Disorder which I found upsetting ; especially from this man who claims to be the most non - judgmental person on earth.

I’m sure many on this forum get unfairly judged. Narcissists, those with bi-polar disorder or personality That’s the risk you take by staring. It’s like a double edged sword.

Dividing humanity into labels is never good. Even members with the same types of labels start comparing themselves with others. Is this how humanity is supposed to be.

I’ve spent most of my life feeling like I don’t fit in and starting to feel glad that I don’t.
And sorry. I’m not a diagnosed narcissist.
I’m a Heinz 57 mental disorder case. 😎
 

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