Keep hearing people making nasty comments, but can't prove that its real

EddieH

EddieH

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#1
I keep hearing abusive comments which are consistently homophobic in nature, and I don't identify as gay. So it really is upsetting me and it just happens everywhere i go. I always just hear it in the background and I'm not sure who said it. This has been going on a long time and is really getting to me. I've been diagnosed schizophrenic and have had some visual problems, convinced neighbours are filming me. The abusive comments is really the main problem. Anyone else had anything similar.
 
Parayana

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#2
@EddieH, Yeah mate, happens to me all the time but I'm used to it and can tell myself I'm hallucinating so it doesn't really bother me any more. Used to really bother me for ages though but now I just relax, also seen people who aren't there before.
 
Y

Yellowdiamond

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#3
Similar..yes. I can visualise or hear People.
 
OCDguy

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#4
I keep hearing abusive comments which are consistently homophobic in nature, and I don't identify as gay. So it really is upsetting me and it just happens everywhere i go. I always just hear it in the background and I'm not sure who said it. This has been going on a long time and is really getting to me. I've been diagnosed schizophrenic and have had some visual problems, convinced neighbours are filming me. The abusive comments is really the main problem. Anyone else had anything similar.
Are these comments aimed personally at you :hug: I personally wouldn't think your neighbours would be filming you, what would they gain from it. Another thing to bear in mind, is that sort of thing can be quite time consuming...
 
Mayflower7

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#5
Hi,
I'm sorry your poorly right now, have you contacted your team to inform them?
Take care
 
EddieH

EddieH

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#6
Thanks everyone, I'm alright this is a constant thing in my life. Just got to deal with it like parayana said and learn to ignore it.
 
Mayflower7

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#7
You do need support and help, I hope you get it.
 
LORD BURT

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#8
I get a lot of homophobic jibes as well. makes me feel sick sometimes. voices can really make your skin crawl at times.
 
sadpunchingbag

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#9
i hear voices but they are my own i am saying them its like when you do something over and over for days that turns into weeks and years it will just happen you think you cant control it but in some cases you can Now this is a hot debate between if schizophrenia is thoughts of there own or not it really is too hard to comment on the absolutes all i know for me it is just like ocd thoughts that i think are thoughts but really just me saying horrible things to myself Maybe its the same for you maybe not i dont know dude
 
EddieH

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#10
Yep it's pretty confusing. I'Ve been really badly bullied in the workplace and me and the shrink agree that some of that might be playing a part in what's going on. It's crazy to think I'm abusing myself but it could well be the case @sadpunchingbag ,thanks for the imput everyone
 
OCDguy

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#11
Out of curiosity, would one of the effects of this bullying be constantly questioning yourself :hug:
 
EddieH

EddieH

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#12
I really don't know @OCDguy, the bullying is not recent but i think i might of had some sort of breakdown because of it and might be still recovering. The bullying was all homophobic taunts because i worked on a farm and it was full on blokes world and i didn't really fit in. I lived on the farm and it was constant abuse, it was a dream jobs so i put up with it when I really shouldn't have. It does seem strange that the voices are always homophobic in nature.
 
OCDguy

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#13
What you have written here makes perfect sense to me. I know it's not easy, but I think if it were me, I would need to learn to discard the childish remarks, it is after all a reflection on their mentality and not you as a person. Once you are strong in yourself, no doubt these voices will probably stop. Perhaps working through it with a trained counsellor will pay dividends :)
 
L

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#14
I really don't know @OCDguy, the bullying is not recent but i think i might of had some sort of breakdown because of it and might be still recovering. The bullying was all homophobic taunts because i worked on a farm and it was full on blokes world and i didn't really fit in. I lived on the farm and it was constant abuse, it was a dream jobs so i put up with it when I really shouldn't have. It does seem strange that the voices are always homophobic in nature.
Sounds as if your subconscious is throwing up a a painful memory all the time...perhaps this isn't quite dealt with yet, Eddie? Must have been so horrible for you....sometimes we try and bury this stuff and move on but our mind doesn't work that way. You shove this stuff into mental cupboards but pretty soon the door starts to creak and it all comes tumbling out one way or another. :hug:
 
Parayana

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#15
@EddieH, these comments have just become what Vietnamese Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh calls habit energies in your differently wired brain, I often get delusional thoguhts and hear people saying they are following me, tracking me and are going to kill me. I was stuck over night in London after missing my coach back and hadn't had much sleep for a couple of days which makes it much worse and the comments were getting really bad but I told my self this has been going on for the best part of twenty years now and if people were going to do me in they have had plenty of opportunity to so I lay down on Victoria station floor and got about five and a half hours sleep, when I woke up the comments had calmed down a lot. I was dreading the three hour journey up the motorway on a crowded coach as that always makes me really tense, luckily I've got unlimited data on my phone and those coaches have charging points so I just plugged my phone, stuck my headphones on, cranked up the volume and streamed classic rock and punk all the way up - didn't hear a bloody thing.

Feel for you bud, but these days it's more annoying than scary as I know I'm hallucinating, gets stressful dealing with it for prolonged periods but mediatation calms my mind down for a few hours afterward which helps. I think the hallucinations come from half heard sounds in a noisy environment and damage to the brains tendency to see patterns in things, I was bullied pretty badly as a child and physically, mentally and sexually abused as a child which created a tendency towards mental disparagemnet in my brain which has been exacerbated by the neurological damage caused by street drugs on the rave scene in the nineties. I forgave the people who screwed me over a long time ago, for me personally (however YMMV) I refuse to carry that level of resentment around in my heart and that makes me a better person than the oppportunists who f**ked me up.
 
Z

Zyfa

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#16
Are these comments aimed personally at you :hug: I personally wouldn't think your neighbours would be filming you, what would they gain from it. Another thing to bear in mind, is that sort of thing can be quite time consuming...
I find it strange that it always starts with neighbors using some advanced form of spytech,whatever it is, it uses the same senerios and same suggestive thinking.however i have found meds to be very effective in reducing the voices gradually and calming the body and mind down.
 

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