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Just one more sad girl.

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lexiebeef

New member
Joined
Apr 12, 2019
Messages
1
Location
Portugal
Hey guys.
I would love to be posting about some happy subject, but unfortunately I havent been able to feel happy in a long while. Maybe (probably) Im exaggerating, cause I dont have one simple reason to be sad. Im just, you know, always sad, even when I should be happy.
Basically, Im a 19 years old girl, who supposedly has a lot of friends. The thing is, in the last couple of years, everyone started dating and I just became there, alone, unloved and really fucking sad. Its not that I dont talk with people, I actually never shut up, but I feel like Im always second, third, fourth plan. No one wants to talk to me, they do because Im there, not because Im interesting.
In my 19 years of living, no guy has ever shown interest in me. Never been kissed and really really embarrassed of this. The thing is, I get why they dont like me, Im not pretty, Im the least sexy person in the universe, Im really awkward and every single guy I know considers me a "great friend". Which is great, but not enough.
Today I was counting my talents and I literally have zero. Like, in my life Ive had gym classes, guitar classes, driving lessons and many many more. And theres not one thing that I dont suck at. I would just love to be able to do something good.
Oh, but my biggest flaw? I cant show what Im feeling. Even when I try to sound nice, Im always so arrogant. I cant say i love you, even to my mom. And its not because I dont have those feelings in me, I just... I have no idea why I am like this.
My greatest fear in life is to be forgotten. And I really think Im on that way. And I just hate that so much.
 
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Jules5

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 27, 2019
Messages
1,968
Location
Florida
Welcome Lexiebeef. You are so young yet and I know you feel like having a boyfriend will not happen but it will. I was not to attractive in my teen age years when I hit my 20,s I started to become prettier. So do not be so hard on yourself. Hugs
 
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